{Almost} Wordless Wednesday

On Monday, he ate through one apple..

Big Change

While we were in the hospital, Trevor stayed with my parents overnight. He played with his cousins, who he adores, and had fun day on Thursday. Friday morning, he came to meet his little brother. He was smitten by him instantly. He kept saying he was his baby and how cute he was. It was perfect.

Trevor came back to the hospital a second time and was as joyful as ever. He was not upset to see us in the hospital and didnt mind leaving to go back to Ama and Gaga's house.

Saturday morning, my Mom said he started asking for me. When he heard the doorbell ring, he thought it was us. We were stuck at the hospital all day and didnt go pick him up until about 4:30pm.

He did okay that first night back home. It was just a few hours of unpacking, dinner, and a little playtime. He knew to be very gentle to Gavin. He went to bed in his own room, happily.

Long story short? The next 4 days sucked. He was terrible. He was saying mean things, constantly in time out, mad at me, not listening, crying about everything, etc. It was rough. My heart was broken, knowing he was not my normal child. Luckily, he was always sweet to Gavin. It took him a bit to get used to his name. He kept calling him baby brudder, or that guy. Haha

Tom went back to work on Thursday. I went to bed Wednesday evening, wondering how Id handle a few day old baby and an unruly toddler. Well, Trevor woke up that morning and was his old self. A switch was flipped. He was 100% polite, sweet and loving toward me. He listened again and was happy. I wasnt sure if it was just temporary..but it was not. He has been great since that morning a few weeks back.

Trevor is exactly the big brother we expected him to be. He adores Gavin. He "pets" his head, give him the pacifier, shushes him when he cries. He loves to hold his hand in the car. He constantly gives him kisses and snuggles. He does not mind when I feed him and will often sit with us. He is also helpful to me. He will get a diaper and wipe if I ask. He loves bringing me the bouncer to put Gavin in. He loves holding Gavin and cant help but cover him in kisses when he does.

Im not sure why he needed those 4 days to adjust to the change. I imagine it was a mix of being away from us, realizing this is our new life and also having Tom home and doing most of his care. I am thankful we are past that stage and their friendship has started to form. :)

Birth Story & Hospital Stay

Its about time I get around to sharing my birth story! Life has been hectic since Gavin joined us 10 days ago. I still stop what I am doing, at least 15 times a day, and question how I got this lucky? I have two beautiful, healthy sons. I am amazed at how the moment I saw Gavin, my heart split in two. Right down the middle. Equal, different love for my little men. Anyway, lets get back to how my second boy entered the world..

Wednesday night, we were in bed and I leaned over to Tom. I gave him an innocent look and said, "So, when do you want the next one?" Considering we were getting induced in 10 hours and I was still pregnant, I was sure he would say something like..lets talk about it later. Or, lets see what happens after him. Instead, Tom answered, "Whenever Dr. M can get us on the books." Talk about making my heart skip a beat. I am so thankful we are on the same page with our plans for our future and children. It was a beautiful thought to fall asleep to.

I did manage to fall asleep and woke up read to call L & D. Unfortunately, I looked at my clock and it was 3am, not 6am. I knew there was no way I was falling back asleep, so I got up. I watched some TV, ate cereal, a banana and yogurt and relaxed. 6am came around surprisingly quickly and I started to get things ready to go. They gave me the OK to head in at 7:30, so I hopped in the shower while Tom and Trevor snuggled. We dropped Trevor by my sisters and were at the hospital at 7:30 sharp.

We were taken to our room and got started right away. I changed into my gown, got my bands, had my IV, hooked on to the baby monitor and contraction monitor, etc. We answered questions and signed papers and finally got pitocin started at 9:25. Before that, I was contracting on my own, every 7 minutes. The nurse did check me right away and I the same as my Monday doc appt.

We brought our Friends season and rotated with watching episodes and the news. It was just me and Tom, which was nice. The pitocin went up by 2, every 20-30 minutes. I had a great contraction pattern going right away and they were running every 3-4 minutes for hours. At 1:25pm, my doctor came in. The pitocin was up to 18 at this point. She checked and I was 2-3 cm dilated, 50% effaced and the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart. She decided to break my water and said I could get the epidural whenever I wanted.

I was totally encouraged at this point. It took me SO long to get to 3 with Trevor, so I was happy this labor was moving faster. After my water was broken, the contractions started to get painful, rather than uncomfortable. I debated when to request the epidural and felt like I should be in more pain to be asking! I went ahead and asked, knowing I would have to wait. Im glad I did, because it was almost an hour before they came to set me up. It was about 5:30pm by then. Tom went to get food and I got a needle in my back. The epi hurt a lot more than with Trevor. But, I managed just fine. The nurse checked me before the put the catheter in and I was the exact same as when they broke my water. Talk about disappointment! Tom came back and all was well for about 30 minutes. I was sitting there, and all of a sudden I looked at Tom and told him I didnt feel right. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. I couldn't catch my breath and tears were streaming down my face. The scared look on Toms face didn't help. The nurse came in, put my bed down and tried to see what was wrong. My heart rate went up to 150, but Gavins stayed steady. It lasted a few minutes and I felt better. They checked my epidural and that was fine. They weren't sure what happened..but it was a terrible feeling.

Tom and I were getting antsy at this point. Everyone was checking in wondering where the baby was. I just kept saying how badly I wanted to hold him. They checked me a few hours later and we couldnt believe there was still no change. At this point, I was feeling like crap. I was shaking, but so warm. I felt nauseous constantly. Its like everything went downhill after the epidural, when you're supposed to be feeling better! I was starting to wonder how long theyd let me go before they talk about a c-section.

My nurse talked to the doctor and they decided to lower my pitocin from 20 to 10 and gradually increase it again. From 7:45-11:15pm, it went from 10-22. That whole time, I felt nauseous and threw up many times. At 11:15, the nurse checked me before she left for the night. I was 5-6cm and 90% effaced. I was so glad to not hear 2-3! I came to terms with having him on 3/2 and told myself to get some rest! My Mom and sister came by for about an hour. They gave me some Zofran, after I puked again. Our birth photographer arrived about 11:30 also. She didnt want to fall asleep and risk missing it. Tom and I both wanted and needed to sleep, so she took a few pictures and then went into the waiting room to do some work.

From 12-4, Tom and I slept on and off. I was anticipating feeling the intense pressure I did with Trevor and was surprised at how mild it was. I felt it for about 2 hours before I said something. I knew the longer I dealt with it, the shorter my pushing time would be. At 4:15, I asked the nurse what the plan was and she said she could check me then. She casually said, "Youre complete, lets get ready to push." And just like that, we were wide eyed and ready to go. I asked her if I could brush my teeth first, she agreed. :) I was worried that he wasnt low enough due to the lack of pressure, but that was not a problem. I pushed with the nurse, starting at 4:22 am. The epidural was turned way down and I could feel everything. It was a good feeling, though. With Trevor, my legs were jello and I didnt even know when he was coming out. This time, I could feel his head and it was such a nice motivator. I pushed with her for about 20 minutes and then she had me stop because the doctor wasnt back yet. The doc came in, apologized for being hung up in the ER, and he was out in 7 minutes, at 4:58 am. She would have me push and then stop to allow stretching. Again and again until he slid out. Thanks to that, I did not tear or need an episiotomy. She placed him on my chest and I waited for him to cry. It felt like it was taking forever and I honestly had the thought of, not again! Gavin started screaming after a minute and snuggled right in. I couldn't believe how much he looked like Trevor or how tiny he was. I held him for about 10 minutes and then asked for them to weigh him!

The nurse did her little work up and I was shocked he was only 7lb, 6oz. I could see him the whole time, which was nice. I was bleeding quite a bit and Dr. K kept mashing on my stomach. It hurt so bad. Then, she was literally digging clots out of me..I just kept my eye on Gavin and Tom and waited for it to be over. Finally, they brought him back to me and before we knew it, it was just us in the room. Gavin breastfed right away and we soaked in the first moments with him. We let our families know he arrived and were taken over to our postpartum room after about an hour.

Tom and I were leaning toward a different name and shortly after he came out, I told Tom that he wasnt it. He was Gavin. Gavin Thomas. And we LOVE it. I was hoping he would come out and make it easy for us to decide..and he did. :)

We couldn't have visitors until 10am, so that gave us time to enjoy him and relax a bit. My parents brought Trevor by first and he was so cute. He walked in, excited about bringing donuts and walked right over to Tom. He smiled and kisses Gavin like he knew exactly who he was. I will never forget those moments.

He kept saying, "He is so cute!" and thought it was funny when he opened his eyes. We were so glad that first meeting went perfectly.

We had visitors throughout the day, mostly family.

I felt pretty good the rest of the day. My stomach was tender and they kept coming back to push on it some more. The pediatrician gave Gavin a clean bill of health. It was so odd to have a normal hospital stay. Once we got into our room, they left us alone. They only bothered us every few hours for a vital check on me. Otherwise, nurses stayed away and let you enjoy your newborn.

We stayed Friday night and kept Gavin in the room with us. Saturday morning, we were up and ready to go home! We had the option to stay another night, but were so ready to be home with Trevor. They gave us a little celebratory lunch, which was cute and yummy.

Gavin had his hearing test done and passed. I got the clear from my OB and Gavin got his.

The day went by so slow and were had to sit around and wait for the birth certificate woman to get to us. Finally, at about 4pm, we were outta there!

We drove to my parents to pick up Trevor and he was very happy to see us. We arrived at home that evening and began our life as a family of 4..

Ah, there it is! Mine and Gavin's story. <3

I have so much more to share. My recovery. Trevors adjustment. Life with 3 boys. Thoughts on #3. And most importantly, TONS of pictures. My photographer has my maternity and birth photos on a disk and she is bringing it to me on Thursday when she does his newborn photos!

HE IS HERE!

I am THRILLED to introduce Gavin Thomas Robertson. He was born at today, 3/2/2012 at 4:58 am. He is 7 lb, 6 oz. and 19-1/4 inches long. He is healthy and beautiful and our hearts are bursting at the seams.

We head home tomorrow and Ill be sure to type up my birth story asap. It was a really tough birth and I am feeling proud of my accomplishment.

TOMORROW!!!!

We are 12 hours from our arrival time for our induction tomorrow. I think it finally became real that we were indeed having another baby after my appointment on Monday.

As of Monday, I was a "better" 1cm dilated and his head dropped a lot. She said expect a slow start and she would imagine he will be born in the evening some time. Doc said she does not think he will be as big as Trevor was. I really don't think so, either.

I am nervous..there is so much unknown going in to an induction. I have been joking that I want him in my arms at 7pm. I just want a healthy baby boy. I have been trying to not compare tomorrow with Trevor's birth. I remind myself that this is a different baby, a different doctor, different hospital. It will be a different experience. I just hope different=better, in this case.

I have been walking around with a goofy grin on my face all day. Its so odd to know when your baby is coming. I'm having a baby tomorrow! Trevor and I took advantage of the beautiful day and went to the Children's museum, got shamrock shakes and rode outside on his little 4-wheeler. I even let him skip his nap so I could get more of him today. :)

I am supposed to call at 6:30am and arrive at 7:30. I think if they're too crowded, they'll tell me to wait. I sure hope that doesnt happen! Ill do my best to post when he is born. Thanks for all of your support during this pregnancy!

Big Brother

Trevor Michael-

Well, here we are. Days away from you becoming a big brother. This is, without a doubt, one of the biggest changes you will encounter in your childhood. We have enjoyed dedicating our every moment to you the past 2 years and 3 months. You have made every single day special. Daddy and I could not possibly love you more than we do. You're smart, silly and loving. You are growing into the little boy we dreamed about for so long. We are proud!

Now, we will need to share our time with another child, your little brother. We have been talking about him daily for months. You are very excited about him! Daddy and I have been thinking about the moment where Daddy will come to the waiting room, scoop you up and give you your first look at baby brother. It makes our hearts beat fast and tears fill our eyes.

You see, Daddy never had a brother. As soon as Mama was pregnant, Daddy knew it was a brother growing inside for you! Nothing compares to the bond you share with a sibling.

You will always be our first born. Our child who showed us a deeper love we did not know was possible. Our chance at a family. Our everything.

We love you, monkey.






Love, Mama

Final Days

Hello, there. I am still here and still pregnant. We finally got internet/cable at our new house on Thursday. Now, I can be connected to the world again.

This past week was beyond hectic. I worked long days through Wednesday and am now officially off until further notice. Poor Tom worked his normal 40 hour week and picked up three security shifts, too. It was exhausting for both of us. We were so excited when Thursday evening came around and we were off together.

Toms birthday was Friday! 26=closer to 30 than it is to 20. ;) We went to a large mall so I could walk a bit, bought a few gifts for others, took Trevor to a new kids jump place and ate a delicious lunch at Red Robin. Friday night, we had his family by for pizza and cake.

In our spare free time, we have managed to finish the boys room! I am really happy with how it turned out. We dont have toys in the bedroom, so there was just enough space for both boys things. We are still in need of a desk and kitchen table. Its gotten frustrating because we cant find anything we like and we dont want to waste money.

Bags on table are big brother gift, Trevors overnight bag, boppy and baby bag for hospital.

No, they dont need any clothes..

..or diapers or wipes..

In still being pregnant news..I went to the doctor last week Monday. Everything looked great, as always. My bp was high when I arrived, again, but went down. I was very worked up about this appointment because I was nervous what she would say! The doctor talked with me for a while about what we should do. Its a fine line between inducing me when my body isnt ready vs. waiting too long and having him be too big which could result in a c-section. She left the room for a few and came back with the date of March 1st. Thursday. One day before my due date. I wasnt thrilled with the day..I was hoping for late last week or early this week. But, between not wanting a Leap Day baby and her being comfortable with the dates..March 1st was chosen.

I left the appointment determined to help get him out. I really wanted to have him on Toms birthday. Tom wanted it too. I have been taking my evening primrose oil and raspberry tea religiously. I got a pedicure. I ate Chinese food. I pumped and pumped. I walked. We had sex. Contractions would come, but never for very long. Finally, yesterday, I declared defeat. I had become so mentally exhausted from trying that I was in a bad mood for a few days. I dont want to end my beautiful pregnancy that way. Instead, I will soak in these next few days and meet him on Thursday. I go back to the doctor tomorrow for one final check. I am hoping all my efforts have at least made me dilate more. That would make me very happy!

We had maternity pictures yesterday and it was a disaster. Its been unseasonably warm here and of course, we had a drop in temp and snow on Friday. I'm not a big fan of indoor pictures, but I didnt have much of a choice considering its February in Chicago. My photographer came by at 11 and unfortunately, Trevor was all ready for bed. He has been waking up earlier since moving to the big bed and he was just done. We didnt get a single picture I wanted. He ended up falling asleep on our bed while Tom and I took some pics. We got him up and after a lot of tears and boogies, persuaded him to go play in the snow. We went to a local park and took like 5 photos..again, nothing like what I wanted. Oh well!! The good news is that if we make it to Thursday, the photographer is open all day to photograph the birth and brothers meeting. I will be so happy if she is able to capture that!

I have Monday-Wednesday of this week to get more done around the house and more importantly, soak in Trevor. We have some fun planned.

No, he still does not have a name! Were liking two right now. I guess we are waiting to see him and are expecting he comes out looking like one or the other. I cant believe I will have him in a few days...