Spectacular Saturday

Before I start babbling, I wanted to answer a few ?'s I have been asked lately.

1-No, we do not cloth diaper. That was just for pictures.
2-The kids I nanny for are 2, 3, and 5. Essentially, my days are spent as a SAHM of 4 children under 5. Its a lot of work, but I love it. Oh, and TODAY she told me that she is pregnant. Things are going to get interesting.
3-I would love to meet with fellow bloggers while in Minnesota. Our time there is short, but I wouldnt pass up this opportunity! Please send me a direct email to TERobertson18@aol.com if you want to set something up!!
4-The best way to contact me and be guaranteed a response, is that email. I check if many times a day and get back to people in a somewhat timely fashion. :)

We had an exceptionally wonderful day this past Saturday. First off, we all got a full nights rest, as Trevor slept from 12:30 am to 8:45 am!! I woke up before him! He has been sleeping well for about ten days. Usually from 10 or 11 until 4 or 5. He has gotten into a little routine and its been very nice.

After we shook off the shock of our rock star baby sleeping so well, we gave Trevor his first bath in his real tub. He LOVED it! He was so calm and relaxed. We put a heater in the bathroom about 10 minutes before we undressed him. It was so warm and toasty in there. I gave him his usual mini massage with lotion after the bath and for the first time, he seemed to really enjoy it.

We headed out with our squeaky clean Trevor for his very first playdate! My friend Jenn, who also got pregnant via IVF, had her son, Logan, just 9 days after Trevor was born. The Mommy's were too excited to introduce our baby boys! We met at Bass Pro Shop to take a picture with Santa. Let me tell ya, Trevy is a big fan! He was fussing a bit in my arms because I only gave him one boob *standing in a bathroom stall, I might add*. I was sure the picture would be a disaster, but reminded myself that it was free. Sure enough, I set Mr. Trevor in the big guys arms and he was content and stared at that white beard. It was adorable!

Afterward, we went to lunch so the Mamas and Daddy could catch up. They are the only real life couple we know that went through IVF. Its amazing the connection you share. We hope to get the boys together once a month so we can watch them grow together. :)

We returned home and relaxed for a bit. Then, it happened. A big milestone I wasnt anticipating just yet. I was holding Trevor and talking away when all of a sudden, HE SMILED AT ME! A REAL SMILE! My heart totally stopped beating for a second there. It was truly one of the best moments in my life. It wasnt just a fluke either. He did it another time, as I was screaming for Tom to come see. He took a break from showing off for a few hours and smiled for both of us later in the night. Ahh.. my son smiles.

Here are Trevors one month pictures. I plan on taking one with his giraffe and a close up with the blocks each month until he is 1 year old!

Who can resist putting a new baby in a stocking? I cant!

Next up? A Tyler and Trevor photo shoot.

Trevor thinking..who is this beast?

These two are going to be trouble..

Tyler thinking..am I really that bad?

Two more pictures from the week. A chubby guy and sleeping angels.

Happy Monday!

Bold Words

Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is one of the things I was most looking forward to doing. When I was told Trevor would be going to the NICU, it was one of my first concerns. Would I be able to feed him? In the NICU, they monitor the baby's food intake very closely. If he had been in the room with me, he would have simply been feed with my colostrum. However, they had to supplement Trevor in the NICU to keep up with his needs. I was immediately worried whether he would be able to latch onto me after having bottles. Also, breastfeeding is not the main concern for the nurses in there. Thankfully, the lactation consultants at the hospital were phenomenal. One met with me the same day I gave birth and showed me how to pump and gave me lots of tips, advice and encouragement. The second day, another consultant spent an hour with us in the NICU, showing me proper holding techniques, answering questions and successfully got Trev to latch on. It was amazing.

I fed Trevor as often as I could, but it was difficult to work around the restrictions of the NICU. Not to mention it was hard work! I was a little worried about how he would do once discharged. I am proud to say, he is the best nurser! We had a little trouble the first few days. My milk came in the first night home and my breasts were super engorged. He had trouble grabbing on. The next day, I went to Target and bought a nipple shield. It was a exactly what I needed! We used that for a few days until I could manage my supply. One feeding I simply took it away and he was fine without it. He has been doing amazing ever since.

I adore breastfeeding him. I love the time spent together. I love knowing I am still providing for him.
My breasts are rock starts in the supply department. They think I need to feed triplets or something. I sit down for 10 minutes and pump 8 oz like its nothing. One entire shelf of our freezer is full.

I will say breastfeeding is a huge commitment. It is time consuming. You cant pass your breast to your husband for a feeding. Trevor is doing great with bottles, but does not have them often. Breastfeeding in public is a hoot. On Sunday, we took all 5 kids to the Winter Wonderfest at Navy Pier. It was a challenge to find a place to nurse Trevor while entertaining 4 other children and trying to have some privacy. That's where the Hooter Hider comes in handy. :)

I plan on exclusively breastfeeding Trevor until he one year old. However, if we do a FET in August like we intend to, I will wean him early and provide him breast milk in bottles until his birthday.

Oh yeah, my boobs are now a 38E. Never thought Id say that..

Recovery

Four weeks post birth and I am still recovering. In fact, I am still bleeding. Not much, but I am sick of wearing pads every day! My tailbone pain has not gone away and I begin physical therapy for it on Friday. I called my doctor last week to let her know the pain was persisting and she said it would be pointless to do an x-ray because there is nothing they could do for it. Physical therapy is my only option. I am hoping it helps quick! Sitting is painful. Riding in the car, nursing, etc..I change positions every few minutes to try to find comfort. We saw a movie last week and for some reason, the chair hurt me so bad, I almost wanted to leave.

Other than that, I feel great. I weigh about 6 lbs less than when I got pregnant. Yipee for losing IVF weight. I have about 5-10 lbs to go until I am really happy. I need the go-ahead to do crunches so I can have a somewhat flat tummy again. I am really anxious for that 6 week appointment. I want to be able to exercise and have sex!

Siblings

Speaking of sex, when will we have #2? That's the million dollar question. Birth control will NOT be used in our home. EVER. The way I see it, if we get a surprise sooner than wed like, we would be over the moon happy. Trevor took us 2 years, about $12,000 and a lot of pain to get. Wouldn't it be something if we just had sex and got pregnant?! Like those normal folk!?

I don't expect that to happen. Breastfeeding acts as birth control for most. I figure Ill fall into that category. Like I said, if we do not get pregnant on our own while bfeeding, we will attempt a FET in August. I am going to meet with my fertility doctor in the Spring and get him on board with this.

Husband

Tom. Oh, Tom. He has gone and stolen my heart again by being the best Daddy. He is completely hands on. He constantly wants to hold Trevor and kiss him. He does the dirty stuff too..baths, diapers, burps. I am able to leave Trevor with him and not worry. I look at the way he looks at Trevor..and melt. He is so proud that Trevor looks exactly like him, its ridiculous.

I love those two boys more than I ever thought possible.

Vacation

My sister graduates with her Masters Degree on the 19th. We are going to Wisconsin Dells to celebrate! I am currently searching for newborn swim trunks in December..quite a challenge.

I mentioned before that I found a great Southwest sale. Well, we booked our trip to the Mall of America! Southwest was offering $25/one way tix there from Chicago! How could I pass that up? We are going MLK Day weekend, which happens to be my bday weekend. Our friends Christina and Anthony and their 1 year old Madison are also coming. We are super excited!

We are also in the process of planning our big Disney trip. Were looking into the end of April. I hope to have the week chosen, rental home booked and flights bought by the 1st. Well see.

Its amazing how much more you look forward to things like this when you have a miracle child to share it with. Trevor's first plane ride, first Mickey ears, first time in the water park..life is better when you're heart is full.

Work

I had 4 weeks off for maternity leave. I spent one week pregnant, one in the hospital, and two with Trevor. Tom was off for the few days in the hospital, and that was IT! Most couples take much more time off, but not us. I went back to work last Tuesday, the 1st. Remember, I am a nanny. I work M-Thursday, 10 hour days. I am thankful to be able to bring Trevor with me. I couldn't imagine going back to work and leaving him behind. My mom will keep him some mornings if I want. I imagine Ill take her up on that more often as it gets colder and the snow continues. Regardless, I really have the perfect set up. I get paid for caring for children I love and I get to be with my baby.

Motherhood

I have always said I was put on this Earth to be a Mother. It happens to be true. I am doing exactly what I am supposed to. I love every second of this "job." I have never felt something more natural. He just..belongs.

Thanksgiving Week

Moving on to Trevor's second week home..it seems like it was so long ago. We were glad it was a short work week for Daddy, we really miss him when hes gone. We had one day of warm weather and took advantage by taking everyone for a walk.

Trevor had his 2 week check up on the Tuesday before Turkey day. He grew 1/4th of an inch and weighed 9 lb. 7 oz. We have no issues with weight gain here!

Trevor woke up on Thanksgiving with the dreaded newborn rash. It was terrible that day, but has gotten much better since. It seems to be irritated when he sweats. I hope he doesn't end up having sensitive skin and its just a temporary thing.

Our whole family went to my Aunt and Uncles for dinner. My mom has made dinner my entire life. This is the first year we were invited somewhere..all 14 of us. I made two deserts and got great reviews! Tyler was very sick with a high fever and double ear infection, so they missed dinner.

We left their house, picked up the dogs and headed to the cottage. We hadn't been there since mid-August and were very excited to see what has been done! My brother had bought a huge fireplace that helps keep the basement warm. He also splurged on two snowmobiles that we cant wait to use!

We had the best weekend. We lounged and relaxed and snuggled like crazy. I rented Super Mario for Wii for the kids. Somehow, Tom and I ended up addicted and played it like crazy.

Here is Delaney nursing her baby with my boppy and hooter hider.

Ahh, my Mini-me!

We dreaded the weekend ending. I had one more day of maternity leave before returning to work on that Tuesday.

I have a lot running through my mind lately. I hope to find the time to sit down and blog about it soon. For now, I am going to stare into those beautiful blue eyes..

Ten Days Old

I turned ten days old on November 21st. Mama kept telling me we had a big day ahead of us. She was right! First, we drove to have my newborn pictures taken. I didn't have any taken in the hospital because I was in the NICU, so my parents made an appointment with a photographer. They wanted to get plain newborn pics, our Christmas card pic and some family ones. Turns out, I do not like to be naked and put in random places without someone snuggling me. What can I say? I'm a sweet boy. Here are the ones Mama liked. They are all plain newborn ones. She did not like the family ones or Christmas ones. I was crying in most of them. And she is critical of herself. Daddy told me to remind her that shes pretty.

Oh, I almost forgot. My belly button fell off when my parents went to change me on that day. Another milestone.

After the photo shoot, we rushed home, I ate and we changed. Then, we drove into Oak Park to attend my first wedding. Mama and Daddy were happy to take me there, since it was at the church they were married at. I found it a bit boring; Mama said most boys do. I slept the whole time. See my friend, Froggy? Yep, were best buds when Im in the carseat. He soothes me.

Again, we rushed back home, I ate, we changed, and then headed to the reception. Mama and Daddy found me the perfect shirt to wear. Everyone fought over holding and loving on me. I was a very good boy and alert for hours. Mama and I danced to a song called "At Last"..she told me it was very fitting. The whole family had a great time.

Me and Uncle Mike

At last..

My Mama, Ama and Ga-Ga, Auntie and Uncles!

Molly and Me

My family-I'm the cute one

Have a good weekend, everyone. I'm gonna go get me some boobie.

Love, Baby Trevor Michael

First Week Home

I am going to try HARD to catch up to present day. Im giving myself the deadline of Trevor turning one month on December 11th. I have my work cut out for me.

Lets begin with Trev's first week out of the hospital..

Trevor meeting the dogs. Or the dogs meeting Trevor. Tom did bring a blanket home for them to smell one day he ran home for 20 minutes. We didnt anticipate any problems and the dogs are adjusting well.

These two waited a long time to meet Mr. Trevor. Delaney cried every day we were in the hospital, wanting us to come home and feel better. She is the proudest cousin. She told my sister she wants to be part of our family now and she wants to sleep in his crib with him. She has been glowing since the day she met him.

Braydon is pretty sweet on him too. He loves to kiss him and call him Trevy boy.

Trevor in his swing. We love our Lamb swing!

I recognize that yawn from our 4D ultrasound. Little Lion is an appropriate nickname.

We took T to the pediatrician the day after he came home. She didnt bother testing his bilirubin because she could tell he was fine. He got a great report and was back to his birth weight, which they changed from 8 lb. 12 oz. to 8 lb. 13 oz. Hey, whats another ounce?

Photography by Delaney. Were..giddy!?

Sleeping in my bear outfit. He loves to be held close and enjoys his Snugglenest.

Laney testing out a bottle. He has no issues taking different nipples. Binkys, bottle, mine..he can do it all!

Delaney spent all day with us and was my little helper. I put Trevor down for a nap and told her to come get me in the shower if he started to fuss. I came downstairs to this-my babysitter asleep on the job! Thankfully, they were both peacefully sleeping.

The only caption I can think for this is-There is a baby in my backseat. Hallelujah! We went to the Train restaurant for Tylers first birthday, which was the day Trev turned one week. He was such a ham!

Tyler having some of my rootbeer float..he was obsessed.

The train bringing his cupcake.

Tyler going to town.

Later in the night, this is his cheeseball smile.

Trevor in his doggie jammies with his guard doggies. :)

Trevor visiting Charleigh, Ben and Annie. I have watched these kids for almost 6 years. They are like family and in fact, call Trevor there cousin.

Monumental day-watching COPS with Daddy for the first time.

THAT was exhausting..

This is how Trev rolls.

There have been many naps with Daddy. He has the easy job.

I love my naked Buggy!

His adorable bear hat.

It finally stopped raining so we could take pictures by the Stork..

Trevor and Ama. We are so thankful for her and all shes done.

My two handsome T's.

See Daddys stitches? Yep, we love the hospital so much we couldnt stay away for more than a few days!

Feeling exhausted after all this? Sick of pictures? Trevor is too..

NICU Stay

The last post was about the facts of the labor and delivery. I didn't touch much on the emotional aspect. I have to say, I have never felt so proud of an accomplishment. That's what I feel 24 hours of labor was.. It was long and exhausting, but I can not wait to go through it again. and again. and again. :)

After our sweet Trevor was taken to the NICU, we had a bit of time before we could go see him. Tom gathered our stuff as I began to feel my lower half again. I was placed into a wheelchair and off we went.

We entered the NICU, and were taken to a corner and saw this:

Talk about breaking out hearts! It was so hard to see him with cords attached and an IV in his teeny hand. See his footprints above? Yep, they had to put them on the card sideways because his feet are so big! Anyway, we were able to hold him and I tried feeding him. He had no interest whatsoever. I was really worried his NICU stay would hurt his chances for breastfeeding.

The nurse let us watch as he had his first bath. All I kept thinking was..I should be giving him his first bath. I should be changing his diapers. I should be holding his without cords attached! I felt helpless.

Looking handsome and clean

We left the NICU and headed to our room. We kind of sat down and thought-Now what? We were on the Mother/Baby floor..with no baby. We made phone calls, returned messages, etc. I was running on pure adrenaline. Soon, the pain began. My tailbone was in excruciating pain. Every time I sat or moved positions, OUCH! I began pumping Wednesday afternoon and the lactation consultant was impressed with how much colostrum I was getting. We would go back and forth to the NICU as often as possible. We were not allowed in during the three shift changes for 30-45 minute increments. They told me to skip breastfeeding the rest of the day and try again tomorrow. Some family came in the evening. We were allowed two adults at a time, one being Tom or myself. Somehow, we managed to stay up the entire day and finally went to bed after midnight.

Thursday, we got up and slowly got ready to spend time with our baby. I was moving very slow. Finally around 9:30am, Tom wheeled me down to the NICU only to be turned away. Turns out, we were not allowed in while the Dr. did rounds, which was 8-11:30 am. We went back to our room like sad puppy dogs. We went in right at 11:30 with the lactation consultant and I nursed Trevor for the first time. He did a great job, I was beaming with pride. The nurse came by and told us that Trevor was doing wonderful and could be discharged the following day.

We went back to our room to eat and relax. Shortly after, we tried to return to the NICU and were told to give them 15 minutes. We figured it was another shift change and went back to our room. 20 minutes later, we tried again and they said come back. Tom asked the woman why they were turning us away and she said they were giving him a new IV and the Nurse would call us when she could. Tom could hear him screaming. We went back to our room and didn't talk at all. We couldn't figure out what went wrong in the short amount of time we were away. We felt sick to our stomaches not knowing what happened. FINALLY, an hour and a half later, a Nurse called. She said his IV in his hand fell out and they tried multiple times to get it back in. When that didn't work, they had to call a head nurse and she put one in his head. Sigh. We were sad he went through that, but so thankful it wasn't another issue. We were upset they didn't tell us that in the first place. We practically ran back to the NICU to see Trevor.

Friday we woke up and were SO excited to be leaving the hospital. We visited Trevor after the doctor did rounds and packed our bags. We met with a Nurse, who gave us minimal instructions on how to care for him. Thank goodness we know babies! My doctor came in and checked me out. She gave me a prescription for my tailbone and said if the pain persisted to get an x-ray. Around 2 pm, our miracle was released to us..no cords, no IVs, just a little baby we couldn't wait to cuddle!

I cant put into words how amazing it felt to get him out of the NICU. We felt pangs of guilt and sadness for the other babies that weren't being released that day. It made us that much more thankful for our little guy.

We arrived home around 3 and the fun really began..

Birth Story

Nearly two weeks have flown by..I think its time for the birth story.

First off, I must say the Monday before my induction was such a great day. I soaked up every last second of that big 'ol belly. All day I couldn't stop thinking things like-This is my last pregnant shower. This is my last time driving for a while. This is the last time I will feel his hiccups. I was on cloud nine knowing I would meet my long-awaited son the next day. Or so I thought..

After very little sleep on my end, Tom and I woke up and loaded the car. We were told to be at the hospital between 7:30 and 8 am. You better believe we arrived a bit before 7:30. We were so ready to get the party started! Tom and I passed the NICU on the way to Labor and Delivery. Tom said, "Well, at least we wont be spending time in there." I touched my belly and replied, "Yep, this boy is fully cooked." Oh, the irony..

We checked in and were taken right to our room. It happened to be the same room both Delaney and Tyler were born in. In fact, my first nurse was the nurse that helped deliver Tyler a year ago. Anyway, I got into my gown and was able to leave my bra on. I really don't like the feeling of not wearing one and luckily Nurse Lori said I could keep it on. Tom and I couldn't wipe the huge grins off our faces. I knew I had a long road ahead of me, but I was so ready.

Last belly shot-40W3D

The Soon-to-be Daddy

By 8:00 I was hooked up to the IV and external monitors. At 8:20, Nurse Lori began my pitocin at level 2. At 9:00 am, my doctor came in to check me. Unfortunately, I was still only 1 cm dilated and 50% effaced. Much to my surprise, she broke my water at the same time. Because she broke my water, she placed an internal monitor on Trevor. That was taped to my leg until right before pushing. Nothing came out for a while and then it was gush after gush after gush. I had to hold a towel between my legs if I was anywhere but the bed. At 11:00 I had a popsicle, the only thing I ate during labor, and my pitocin was upped to 10. Each time the pitocin level was adjusted, it went up by 2. She did this roughly every 30-45 minutes. By 12:30, I could feel the contractions more and moved to the birthing ball. I believe this is when I realized I was having back labor. Tom would massage my lower back as hard as he could.

Toms mom and sisters came by to visit in early afternoon. We warned them it was going to be a long process, but they wanted to show their support. Plus, Stefi enjoyed being taken out of school early. :)

At 2:00 I was checked again and was horrified when she said I had no change. The Nurse said they were having trouble putting me into labor enough to change my cervix. When I was checked this time, they placed an internal contraction monitor next to his head, which was supposed to help get the level of pitocin right. That was painful. At 2:30, my pitocin level was 22. I did not enjoy going to the bathroom attached to an IV, two internal monitors and while leaking fluids.

I was feeling much stronger contractions after they put the pitocin level up. Until this point, I was very good at switching positions. I used the birthing ball, rocking chair, layed on both sides in the bed, etc. When the contractions became stronger, the only comfortable position for me was to stand, lean forward on the back of a chair and rock back and forth. Tom would massage my back and we tried rotating hot and cold on it.

At 4:00, the internal contraction monitor fell out and I was dreading them putting it back in. Thankfully, Nurse Lori said they finally got the pitocin right and we could use the external monitor again. Yay! My highest level of pitocin was 26-which is extremely high! They checked me at 6pm and I was a whopping 2cm dilated and 80% effaced.

My mom and sister were in the room in the late afternoon/early evening and I didn't mind it. In fact, I wasn't an irritable woman in labor. We brought a Friends season to play and watched that all day. I was never bothered by people talking or Tom eating. In fact, I was smitten by Tom the whole time. He was the greatest coach and so supportive. I never wanted him to leave my side.

Getting back on track..after standing for hours and hours and realized how tired and achy my body was, I assessed the situation. The bottom line was, I knew I had many hours of labor ahead of me and if I didn't get some rest soon, I wasn't going to be able to push him out. I did not want to end up with a C-section after all we had been through. So, I decided to get an epidural.

Belly with no fluid..so tiny!

The epidural was placed at 7:30 pm. I didnt think it was painful at all. I did, however, find it obnoxious to have another cord attached to me. I felt relief pretty quickly and it definitely sped things up. I was checked at 8pm and was 3.5 cm's dilated and a catheter was placed. My contractions were 2.5-3 minutes apart. Our families went home and we were told to call them when I was 9 cm's. We tried to get some rest, but it was nearly impossible.

I did my best to move while immobile from the belly down. I rolled from side to side every 30 minutes. When I say rolled..I really mean I would try to help Tom move me. It was so hard to get comfortable while attached to so much. I was checked again at 10:00pm and was 4cm's. Nurse Lori went home at 11pm and we got our night nurse. So much for our 11-10-09 baby!

I was checked at 2am and was 6.5 cm's and was told his head really moved down. We slept in little 20 minute increments, between the nurse coming in to take my blood pressure, temperature, etc. Somewhere around this time is when it happened..pressure. Oh, the pressure. I'm not sure which part of labor was more intense; the back labor before the epidural or the pressure that came later. Regardless, it was beyond painful. Turns out, Trevor was turned funny and putting all his weight on my back/tailbone. Even an epidural cant help that.

At 4:15, I was 8-9cm dilated. Unfortunately, we found out I had a fever of 100.6. No wonder I finally slept for 40 minutes straight! The nurse left to let the doctor know and to get me antibiotics. Shortly after she did that, I started to feel ill. I had a headache and just felt crappy. Trevor was hanging on strong this entire time, never showing a single issue.

My mom and sister came quickly and hung in the room with us. I was in such intense pain, all I could do was close my eyes and try not to watch the clock. At 5:45, I was 9.5 cm dilated and almost 100% effaced. She said I had a little bit of cervix I needed to get rid of before I could start pushing. My body did not agree with that and I had to fight the urge to push. Out of nowhere, I felt nauseous and told Tom I was going to puke. Sure enough, 2 seconds later, I vomited in 3 basins. So much for re-applying my makeup before I met my son..

From 6-7:30am, I was checked numerous times and kept being told "just a little bit longer." 7am is the shift change, so I was given another nurse and another doctor from my practice. Thankfully, it was my other fave doc! The new nurse was great. She was reassuring, letting me know that he was so low and I wouldn't have to push for long. FINALLY, at 7:40 am, we kicked everyone out and I started pushing. Pushing was a total out of body experience and by far the best part of the labor. There were no stirrups, no counting. I held my legs, Tom held one and the nurse held the other. I pushed as long as I wanted. It was wonderful. I did one set with the nurse and could immediately feel his head. I pushed for about six sets and at 8:18 am, Trevor Michael was welcomed into the world.

Much to our shock, Trevor did not cry immediately and had to be taken to the incubator, rather than placed on my chest. I did not cry when I saw him. I was in complete survival mode-I wanted to know what was wrong with my baby. Tom was very emotional, it was the sweetest thing. I kept my eyes locked on Trev as she delivered the placenta and stitched me up. One stitch, that is.

They checked Trevor out and said they wanted to give him a 48 hour antibiotic in the NICU because of my fever and his very low grade fever. There was talk of a chest x-ray and other tests that needed to be done. They wrapped him up and said we could have 30 minutes with him before he was taken. Tom and I loved on our boy for about 10 minutes before our Moms and sisters came in, not knowing there was anything wrong. He was whisked away far too quickly and we were told to relax and we could go to the NICU soon..

I'm going to cut this off here, because you know that Trevor is now 100% healthy. I will post about our NICU stay soon!