Hoping for our own Peanut

Natural Inducers?

2012-02-09T10:29:00.000-08:00

I had my doctor appointment last night and all is well with baby boy! I did my weight, urine, bp, heartbeat check, measurement, group B test and cervix check. Im still at 1, but softening more. I was very surprised considering all I have done in the past few weeks! Before he left, I did ask about if theyll make me go to my due date based on how big Trevor was. He said as long as theres something going on with my cervix, they would offer me an induction date once I hit 39 weeks. If you remember, 39 weeks exactly is on Friday, the 24th. Its the date I have had in my mind and in my heart this entire pregnancy. It would be so perfect to go in that day, Toms birthday, have Trevor taken care of, have the whole weekend for visitors, etc. Of course, Id love for him to come on his own before then!! Plus, that date may not be an option with the docs. Regardless, I left the doctors office so happy! I will for sure have a February baby! And he will be in my arms in 20 days or less!

Now, my goal is to get this cervix to cooperate. Anyone had good success with natural inducers? I plan to do the harmless ones..sex at least every other day, pineapple, raspberry leaf tea, evening primrose oil, etc. I will walk as much as possible and try to move him down. Please share if you have had an experience, good or bad, with any of these! Or, if you have any other suggestions! Thanks in advance.

I go back to the doctor next Wednesday morning. Heres to hoping I can make a difference in the next 5 days!

All Moved!

2012-02-08T10:30:00.000-08:00

Hello? Anyone out there?

That was a LONG blog break. We cut off Internet at our old condo Monday of last week. We moved over the weekend and there is no installation date set for the new house yet. I need to make that call today.

We moved everything on Friday, in less than 8 hours. I was astonished! We had a lot of help and were so grateful. I have not sat down for more than a few minutes since Friday. The house looked like a tornado ran through it on Friday evening and I have been piecing each room together. My main priority is getting ready for the baby, in case he comes soon. I washed all of the 0-3 month clothes, got the swing and rock and play set up, got the bottles out, etc. I want to paint the boys room in the next few days and finish that first. We still need a new desk and a kitchen table. I need organization bins for the basement. I plan to pack my hospital bag this weekend.

I go to the doctor tonight and am feeling very anxious about it. I am hoping for some progress. I want a February baby!!

Here I am at 36 weeks, 4 days. Trevor woke up from his nap and was lovin' on baby brother.

Childrens Museum

2012-01-30T19:27:00.000-08:00

Trevor's days as an only child are numbered. My work life has slowed down, which has allowed me a lot of special time with him. I have been trying to keep on day a week for fun, even though I can always come up with errands and every day tasks instead. A week or so ago, we decided to check out a different children's museum. We have a pass we bought last February which gets you in to all of the local children's museums. We have a lot around here, Id say 4 or 5 within a 40 minute drive. We have used it a ton and it has paid for itself again and again. We plan to go a few more times next month and then renew in April or May.

This museum was a huge hit! Trevor stood at the sand table for almost 30 minutes straight. Its a good thing the Easter bunny is bringing him a sandbox. :) We went with our friends Elise and Colton. Colton will be 1 on March 3rd, the day after I am due! It has been fun for me to watch him grow, knowing our little guy will be that size next year. He is having a big birthday bash on March 4th and I have sworn I will be there. Overdue or with a brand new baby!

We stayed at the museum about 2 hours and Trevor was exhausted. I was sure he would fall asleep in the car, but he didn't. We were pulling into our subdivision and he just started to doze off. I put him in his crib and sat down to rest a bit. Then began the 2 hour nap battle. Oh my, was it exhausting! Especially because I knew how tired he was and how much he needed to sleep. I ended up waving my white flag and he did not nap.

It all started a few weeks ago. I was in bed and heard him say, "I'm up, Mama." I didn't even have a chance to roll out of bed and then there he was, next to me. I was shocked. This was a first. A very scary first! I took the approach of telling him how dangerous it was to climb out and I didn't want him to get hurt. Who am I kidding? The kid hops out like a pro. The next few days, we endured a battle at bedtime and naptime and crabby days since he was so overtired. We were so close to buying a crib tent. Thankfully, he the new trick isn't as exciting any more and we have had days of no problems. The only negative is that he comes to bed with me the second he wakes up. I love the cuddle time, but its too early for both of us! He was sleeping until 7:30 or 8 and now he is in bed with my around 6:30. I have to say, if this is the biggest challenge we have faced in his 26 months of life, we are very fortunate!

We will transition him into either a toddler bed or a single bed once we move. It just seemed silly to make another drastic change with so much going on. We get the keys to the house Thursday evening and I am so excited! The goal is to get everything moved and somewhat organized, while avoiding going into labor.

35/35

2012-01-27T20:45:00.000-08:00

Whenever I read blogs and see they are at the 35 weeks pregnant/35 days to go stage..I feel like they are so close. Somehow, I am that woman and we are down to 5 weeks left! Hopefully less. ;)

How far along? 35 Weeks!

Total weight gain/loss: Up 17 lbs.

Maternity clothes? Yep. And I scored two new nursing tops at Target for $5 each.

Sleep: Better!

Best moment this week: The weekend spent relaxing, after the worry was gone!

Movement: Oh, yes!

Food cravings: I wanted Subway the other night..Tom happily went and got us some.

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: Ive been having lots of contrax after doing too much. But, when you're moving at 36 weeks pregnant, you have to pack!

Belly Button in or out? Flat, but still not out yet!

What I miss: Nothing. My days of being pregnant are numbered..then I'm back to being infertile.

What I am looking forward to: Everything! Going into labor, having another birth story, snuggling our newborn, breastfeeding..

Milestones: Started dilating!

To honor this big milestone, we made a cast of my belly! It was super messy and difficult to breathe while being covered. It turned out better than I expected. It takes a full day to completely dry. I'm hoping to paint the outside and put Trevor's hand print on there. I may tie a ribbon to the top and hang it in the boys room.

Big Changes

2012-01-26T19:11:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking a lot lately about how much Trevor's life is going to change in a few short weeks. We wanted this so bad and for so long, it almost feels wrong to have these feelings.

Trevor has been our world for over 2 years. He gets Mama 24/7 and Daddy nights and weekends. He loves his time with the 3 of us. He is always asking where Daddy is. He prefers to have our family in one place. Don't we all?

I have taken care of other children his entire life. But, having a new baby in our own home is very different. For the first time, I will have to tell him to wait until I am done feeding the baby, changing the baby, etc. He will have to share his Mama and Daddy with a new little guy.

Part of me feels like his world is going to be rocked and we may face some challenges. But, part of me feels like he will go with the flow, as he has with every single day of our life, and he will be fine.

After all, we are giving him the greatest gift we ever could. A brother.

Pics are from my bday dinner last week.

Trevor climbs out of his crib now(thats another story), so our once a week morning cuddle sessions have turned into every morning cuddle sessions. This is when Trevor loves on my belly the most. He always checks on baby brother or "Elf", as he still calls him. He will rub his bear on him and talk to him. I am going to miss the love affair, but have a feeling it will be even better when I am watching him do those to his baby brother laying next to him.

2 little boys in my bed? How did I get so lucky?

Oh, yes. I had mentioned before how I got Trevors big brother gift together. I got a kid tough camera for free back around Christmas and saved it. We have loaded it with batteries, so Trevor can join in with the picture taking at the hospital. I bought him 2 books, one is called Michael is a big brother and ones is a giant board book on Babies. Lastly, I got him a tub of dinosaurs. I figure they will keep him entertained while at the hospital or back at my parents house. I was excited about the gift!!

Then, we bought this.

Let me tell you the story behind this beauty. I have been wanting this for Trevor since his 1st birthday, but couldnt bring myself to pay $350. I tried to justify it when I found out we were having another boy..but still couldnt fork over that money! Last week, my sister was at Target and noticed one on the clearance rack. She forgot to tell me until a few days later. I called the store and sure enough, they still had it. They wouldnt put it on hold for me and wouldnt let me pay over the phone. Trevor was napping and I was 2 seconds from waking him to speed to the store and get it. My brother graciously offered to go grab it. Its a good thing he did, because he beat a lady walking to it. Godfather of the year award. :) It was on sale for $149. THAT is a deal.

Weekend Update

2012-01-24T13:13:00.000-08:00

Hi, all! I am still here and still very much pregnant!! Thanks for checking in. :) I ended up calling the doc before they closed Friday and they assured me that as long as there was no bright red blood or cramping, I was okay. We made the decision to stick it out at the cottage and hope for the best. I had contractions quite a bit when I wasn't lounging on the couch. Luckily, our agenda for the weekend called for a whole lotta nothing. I had some more spotting and discharge through Saturday morning and then it stopped.

Other than that fun stuff, we had a fantastic weekend. Tom, Trev and I drove up to the cottage Thursday evening. Friday, we made oreo truffles, played for hours and relaxed. Sam and Brian arrived later that night and we enjoyed watching the snow fall..having nowhere to go.

I take it back. Daddy and Brian drove to get us giant pizza. Does anyone else have a Bacci by them? They closed the one close to our house, so when Tom noticed they put a new one by the cottage, he decided it was worth the treacherous drive.

Daddy and Brian must have come up with a plan for the evening while on that ride. Sam and I went to bed around midnight, while the guys stayed up until 6am. Yes, 6am! They were drinking beer and playing Wii. Needless to say, they slept the first half of the day away while we hung with Trevor. Our friends Jen, Jason and Logan arrived around lunch time. Logan is Trevor's BFF, and he will tell you that, so he was ecstatic. Trevor took a nap and then it was time to play in the snow.

It was so much fun walking on the lake. Even while we were gearing Trevor up in his snow pants and gloves, he asked if we were going to the beach. He was right, but it was very different than in the summer!

More friends arrived and all 4 boys played together the whole evening. We made yummy stuffed shells and salad. The kids watched Cars and had some dessert. Logan and his parents decided to drive home rather than stay the night. Logan wasn't feeling too well and was sick the next day. Everyone else stayed over. We put the kids to bed and played some beer pong and Apples to Apples.

Sunday, Tom let me sleep in. And sleep in I did. Our guests started to head home and before we knew it, the weekend was over and it was just our little family. Trevor took a nap while we cleaned up and we sadly drove home to start our week. Trevor was in tears when we left. He loves the cottage.

Trevor wearing undies and come tighter stylish jeans=above pic. :)

An update on potty training? Trevor has been 100% trained for a few weeks now. He does still wear a diaper for nap and night. He wakes up dry about 75% of the time. It still feels odd to have a potty trained child. Odd and wonderful.

I changed my OB appt. schedule for Thursday to yesterday. I just wanted to know what was going on! My bp was borderline high, so they will check that again next time. I am 1cm dilated, but long and his head is high. She said to take it easy when I have a lot of contractions, of course.

I had the same bloody discharge today, likely from her checking me. With my luck, Ill still have to be induced, even after all of this. ;)

PS-Baby boy really needs a name! I dont want to be the couple still deciding in the hospital. Why is this so darn hard???

Losing It?

2012-01-20T11:18:00.000-08:00

Last night, I went to the bathroom and wiped pink. I have been seeing some gross discharge since Wednesday, but this is the first time it was bloody. It was like that every time I went to the bathroom until I went to bed. When I got up, I called the OB and told them it seemed to have stopped. They said to monitor it and watch for cramping and let them know if theres any change.

Of course, 2 minutes after I get off the phone with them, I go to the bathroom and there was a different and large discharge(so disgusting!). Since then, Ive wiped more blood and goo. It appears I am losing my mucus plug?! I never lost it with Trevor. We had to pry him out.

Ive had contractions here and there and baby boy is moving around fine. My issue is that we are in Wisconsin at the cottage, so to be checked out I would have to drive home or go to the small local hospital. Im not even sure how that would work with our insurance. Its a blizzard outside right now and supposed to be at its worst for the next few hours. And its Friday, so I wont be able to call the doc to be reassured.

Im going to call and update them and see what they think. I am 34 weeks today and I believe that is the standard time that most docs wouldnt try to stop labor? But, I think they would possibly give me injections for his lungs if they think he is coming soon. Hmm..what to do?

Baby boy, please give Mama 3 weeks. Its all I ask.

Life in Numbers

2012-01-18T07:01:00.000-08:00

=number of years I have been married

=how old our son is

=weeks I am pregnant

=years old I am, today!

I am not happy about getting older, but life keeps getting better. I am thinking 25 will be a great year for me, my marriage and my family.

Tonight, were doing dinner at my parents and tomorrow we are headed to the cottage for a weekend filled with relaxation and some great friends. An extra day with Tom was all I asked for this year. I cant wait!

33 Weeks

2012-01-15T17:50:00.000-08:00

How far along? 33 Weeks!

Total weight gain/loss: Up 16 lbs.

Maternity clothes? Yep, so glad I got 2 new pair of jeans. The ones without the full belly band cut off in the middle and are painful and irritating. I have enough to get me through until I have him. I just need to find the perfect shirt for maternity pics.

Sleep: Not happening.

Best moment this week: Planning my bday weekend.

Movement: Yes! His head is constantly ramming into my cervix and its quite painful.

Food cravings: Chocolate milk..just like with Trevor

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: Contractions every day.

Belly Button in or out? Flattening.

What I miss: Being able to bend over and put my shoes on. Boots are tough!

What I am looking forward to: Moving! Then, I can wash clothes and get organized!

Milestones: He is in position to come out? Seems soon, I suppose it could still change.

I was thinking it would be cool if he comes before Feb 24th, which is Toms birthday. I turn 25 on Wednesday and Tom is 25 until 2/24. Its the one span of time the whole year where we are the same age. Also, I would LOVE if he came Valentines Day. Or close to it. My sprinkle is on the 12th, so he is welcome after that. Trevor was created on Valentines Day 2009 and I think it would be so special to have 2 sons, 3 years later. <3

Thursdays Thoughts

2012-01-12T19:37:00.000-08:00

My, oh my. I am so tired right now..fighting to keep my eyes open. And yet, when I get in bed, I guarantee I wont be able to fall asleep. This has been a long work week, paired with a week where I can not sleep! Its so frustrating because my body is exhausted and I have hours of quiet time wasted. Even my snoogle doesn't help. Its so hard to get comfortable. I took a small bit of benadryl and Im hoping that will do the trick.

I feel like theres a lot to catch up with..as usual. Lets see:

*Trevor has been in undies 100% since last Friday. We decided to be brave and have him wear undies out. I thought it may be confusing for him to wear undies at home and diapers when were not..and he may have a harder time later on. So, we left the house in undies and haven't turned back! Trevor is doing fantastic! He only wears a diaper to nap and sleep. He wakes up from his nap dry about half of the time and even woke up dry this morning! Ironically, I have been stocking up on diapers this week. I just can not pass up a box of diapers for $5. I bought sizes 1 and 2 and now have roughly 8 boxes for baby brother. Score!

*Yesterday, Trevor called to announce he was awake. Before I even had a minute to roll out of bed, he was next to me! That was a first. I explained to him that climbing out of the crib was dangerous and he needed to wait for Mama and Daddys help. Tonight, I put him to bed and he came out of his room 25 minutes later to pee. Uh-oh! We will see how this pans out..

*Yesterday, it was about 52 degrees here. Today, we had our first little blizzard. Crazy Chicago weather! It didnt amount to a ton, but it is very slick. I am thankful to have a large car and brand new tires for my precious cargo! Were looking forward to playing in it this weekend.

*I had an OB appt tonight. I would usually go alone, but Tom worked his second job this evening. it was super stressful getting off work, feeding Trevor dinner and giving him a quick bath and getting to the appt with all the terrible drivers. Plus, Trevor was whiny and tired. I ended up spilling pee on myself in the bathroom. Wonderful! The nurse took my BP and it was high twice. She came back 5 minutes later and it was still high. She was going to have me lay on my side to lower it, but the doc said she thought it was just circumstances. I must agree.

*Everything checked out great with baby. He is head down and measuring right on track. I feel like he has dropped a lot recently. Ill need to compare pictures this weekend. I go back in 2 weeks..

*We get the keys to the house in 3 weeks and will move that weekend. I have a lot of packing to do this week, since we will be at the cottage next weekend.

*Life has really slowed down since January began and its a welcome change. We done a lot of just hanging out. Tom really appreciates me scheduling time to do nothing. ;)

*I keep thinking how sweet it would be if baby comes around Valentines Day. Trevor was created on V-Day 3 years ago. How wonderful for us to have 2 sons, three years later!

*Our hospital tour Monday was awesome!! It made me want to hop in a bed and get the party started right then. Now we know where to park, which elevators to take and all of their rules and regulations.

*He still doesn't have a name. We truly may wait to meet him to name him.

Alright, I need to attempt to sleep. Wish me luck!

A Text

2012-01-08T18:55:00.000-08:00

I got this text message from my friend Elise earlier today:

So, I'm at work today and a lady came in from Denver who is doing fertility treatments and needs a blood test on a specific day of her cycle. We don't do labs on Sundays and she wanted it shipped to her physician in Denver, which is already kinda a pain in the butt. She was crying because she didn't know what to do...so I fought and begged the lab tech to just draw it even though we aren't supposed to. All I could think about was you somewhere and no one helping you...so YOU made this lady's day..because I won! Just thought I would tell you and let you know how strong and great I think you are.

Made my Sunday.

32 Weeks!

2012-01-06T08:13:00.000-08:00

How far along? 30 weeks pregnant.

Total weight gain/loss: Up about 12 or 13 lbs.

Maternity clothes? Yes and I got two pretty shirts in the mail today. :)

Sleep: This week was terrible, until I took some meds last night. I am getting more tired during the day. Carrying around the extra weight and working and caring for a toddler is tiring.

Best moment this week: Planning my bday weekend.

Movement: Yes! I am curious about how he is positioned and am looking forward to asking at my appointment next week.

Food cravings: Water, water, water! I have been so thirsty!

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: A contraction here or there.

Belly Button in or out? Flattening.

What I miss: Not having a bloody nose.

What I am looking forward to: Trevor walking into the room and meeting his brother. I have his gift from the baby all bought. I am very excited about it!

Milestones: 8 months pregnant!

Other baby updates? I go in next Thursday for my 32 week appt. I have the rescheduled hospital tour this coming Monday. Baby shower invites go out next week, I am told. We still have no name. I have my favorite and Tom has his. Neither of us want to give in. I still say he is going to surprise us and come early. Time will tell..

I couldnt resist adding this picture of big brother. It has been unseasonably warm here, and weve had almost no snow. Today, it was almost 50 degrees, so we went outside to play a little soccer and take some pics. He is the littler love of my life!

Potty Training

2012-01-02T19:50:00.000-08:00

I had hoped to potty train Trevor close to age 2. I know boys aren't usually ready until closer to 3, but we decided to give it a try. We have had a potty seat for the big toilet and a baby Bjorn one in our bathroom for months. There was little to no interest..until one day, it just happened. About 3 weeks ago, Trevor decided it was time to grow up! He is 100% potty trained..at home. We have not taken the leap to have him wear undies away from home too much yet. Last night was our first attempt and we went to a friends house for about 2 hours. He peed twice while there and came home dry. :) My issue, is the he will tell me he has to go and if I cant find a potty very quickly, he will have an accident. In the summer, I could have a pop up potty in my trunk and have a bathroom available at all times. With our freezing winter ahead of us, I cant subject his bare booty to that. So, I am currently thankful he is saving us about 50% of the diapers we buy and will slowly transition him to wearing undies all day. I do think he will be totally trained by the time brother comes. Yahoo for only one in diapers!
*Yes, I am totally aware he may regress when baby arrives. We will see when it happens!*

Now, some photos of my bathroom. Here are Trevor's options for potty time. I cant believe I have a mini urinal in my home.

Trevor got this watch for Christmas, so he actually was doing well before it came along. You set it for 30, 60 or 90 minute increments and it lights up and plays a song. When it goes off, he dances and says, "Its potty time!" And runs to the bathroom. Its a little peace of mind for me and Tom when are distracted and wondering when the last time he went was.

Here is our reward station. He gets one treat for pee and two for poop. Right now, he has pez or chocolate for his choices.

I am so proud of my big boy. Another piece of his babyhood is quickly fading away. Thank God we have another one coming to start the cycle again.

Ending 2011

2011-12-30T13:01:00.000-08:00

I really can not believe New Years Eve is tomorrow. The last day of 2011. What a year it has been!

It only takes a second for me to close my eyes and remember what the first 6 months of 2011 were. A lot of shots, appointments, co-pays, tears, bad phone calls, beta numbers, heartbreak, blood, transfers, embryos lost, and a string of hope that couldn't have been thinner. It still blows my mind when I think about what we endured to get this healthy pregnancy.

Little Man was transferred mid-June and although we were cautious and scared, we knew he would be our fighter. I haven't been emotional during this pregnancy.. don't think I have cried other than funerals. I think I am bottling it up for when I hold him for the first time. Every ounce of pain we felt for six months will be washed away when we have our angel in our arms.

I raise my glass of Welches grape juice to 2012. Cheers, health and happiness for all!

Christmas Eve and Day

2011-12-27T19:24:00.000-08:00

After we got home from Toms Moms house, we got Trevor to bed as quickly as possible and started building. Tom was in charge of the big train table and I worked on the Thomas one for around the tree. We watched movies and hung out, wrapped a few gifts and the time flew by. Before we knew it, it was 2am!

Trevor slept until 8 and we brought him to bed for snuggles before checking out what Santa brought. This is what he found:

He loved the train table AND the Thomas train. He was super cooperative and enjoyed opening all of his gifts. He got some useful items..plate, bowl, utensils, cups. He got some instruments, a few movies, clothes, art supplies, a few books, etc. Oh yes, and tools for his bench. Those have been a huge hit! Tom bought me a Willow angel, a Pandora charm and pajama pants. I was very happy! Tom got an iPhone a few days before, so we ordered him his Bears case. I debated a lot of other items for him and decided on something I couldn't wrap. In his card, I wrote that I will plan a date once a month. Ill pick the date, arrange a sitter, make the reservations, etc. I will inform him of the plans on the 1st of the month. I am doing this because Tom and I have a hard time making time to be alone. Sure, we relax together after Trevor goes to bed. We enjoy our time with him and prefer to take him places we go. But, I really want to focus on our marriage in 2012, especially with the baby coming. We always have the option of a free sitter and need to take advantage of it more often! Thats my goal, I need to come up with something for January by Sunday. :)

We got a few gifts for baby brother. I had a book and teether and found a few holiday outfits on clearance a few days before Christmas. I cant wait to see him in them next year!

The rest of our day was LAZY! We had cinnamon rolls for breakfast, Trevor was tired early due to the night before and took a great nap. We went to see the Chipmunk movie, since Trevor loves them so much. It was a great day spent with our little family.

I mentioned Christmas morning was normal for us. As soon as Trevor woke up from his nap, we headed over to my parents house. Everyone was arriving and the kids were anxiously waiting for Uncle Tom to get there so we could start opening! I love Christmas at my parents. With all of the kids, its mass chaos. And we keep adding to the brood..little man is #7!

I wrapped a box and wanted to get this picture. Then, Mikey hopped in and we decided to do all of the kids!

Tom walked in the door and paper started flying. There are 4 of us siblings, plus my parents and my Aunt buy for all of the kids. Yep, they are totally spoiled that day. Trevor got some great toys, we got a pass to the Arboretum and my parents bought all of us adults Country Thunder tix.

Here are our little loves..Seriously, I am crazy about each and every one!

We had a delicious dinner, thanks to my brothers Italian girlfriend. We talked about our Florida trip. We laughed until we cried. I love my family so much..I always remind Tom how lucky he got marrying into it. ;)

Lastly, here is Rylan in her Christmas tutu. Of course, she needs one for each holiday. I bought her 5 bows for Christmas..the best part? I will get them back when I have a girl! Someday!

And here we are, days away from 2012. Unbelievable!

How Much Info...

2011-12-25T11:10:00.000-08:00

...can I cram into one post?! We will find out!

Most people are busy opening gifts and spending the day celebrating. We did our family Christmas yesterday, since Tom works today. Trevor and I had a normal morning and now he is napping. Ill write about Christmas later. My goal for now is to catch up until Christmas Eve!

I did my 1 hour glucose test almost 2 weeks ago and I passed it. I am a total sweet lover, even when not pregnant, so I was happy. :) I had an OB appointment that Wednesday. I am back to measuring on track and thrilled about that. I look small and feel small, so we were getting worried. It was a quick and easy appointment. I made the next 3, bringing me all the way to 36 weeks!

I haven't updated about our house purchase because..there hasn't been much movement. This process was a nightmare, I tell you. There was the offer and then the counters and then signing a contract and then getting the inspection done. Problems were found there and then there was the loan approval and an appraisal. Problems were found there. There was waiting and waiting and more waiting. Finally, this week, we told them to forget it. We are short on time and are pretty sure the house would need a lot of TLC and its just too much right now. We need to figure out how we do financially with 2 children and what my work schedule will be like. Luckily, we found a perfect rental! Its blocks from my sisters house as well as a downtown area with a library, shops, train station, etc. It has a full finished basement, tons of storage and a big fenced backyard. Its an actual house! We have been living in a small condo for so long, I am excited about hanging pictures and making a playroom and being able to buy in bulk because we have somewhere to put it! It looks like we will be moving the last week of Jan/first of Feb. That puts me at about 36 weeks pregnant, so I wont be much help. I cant wait to get there, get organized and make it our own.

The plan is for me to watch children at the house starting in April. I have watched children at other homes with Trevor in tow and never had a problem. Now, I cant expect to bring a breastfeeding newborn and a 2 year old to work. I am hoping I am able to line up a few children before baby boy comes..or soon after. I hope I can fill the spots and relax while on maternity leave.

We've been busy having holiday fun this whole month. I wont lie, I already packed up a lot of our decorations late last night. Its a mix of nesting and being so anxious to move and have more space!

We exchanged gifts with a few friends. Trevor is a professional present opener and has been excited about everything. He was such a joy this year. Ill never forget him singing Drummer Boy, Jingle Bells and Santa Clause is coming to town. He loved Santa more every time we saw him. He always told him he wanted cars. :)

We celebrated Christmas with Toms family a day early too. Trevor got a few toys and we got some money as a family. We decided to put it aside and buy Trevor all of the outdoor toys he will need when we move! He has a water table, so we need a picnic table, playhouse and sand box! Oh yes, and Toms dad generously offered to buy Tom a bulletproof vest. Tom has been working one shift a week in a bad neighborhood for extra money. Vests are $500+, so we are very thankful Daddy will be protected!

Seeing Christmas through Trevors eyes was really something special. Add that in with being 30 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby boy and that is a real gift.

I look so tired..this was about midnight, after we set out all the gifts and put together the trains.

How far along? 30 Weeks. Really, THIRTY weeks!

Total weight gain/loss: Up about 12 lbs. Hoping to be up 20, just like with Trevor

Maternity clothes? Yep, got a few new shirts to look decent when we go out. :)

Sleep: Better, actually

Best moment this week: Christmas with big brother!

Movement: He is still very active, but I do think he is getting cramped in there

Food cravings: Still hot chocolate

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: Contractions here and there, nothing big

Belly Button in or out? Still flattening

What I miss: Being able to breathe! And getting up without it being a struggle. ;)

What I am looking forward to: HIM!

Milestones: 3/4 of the way done...EEK!

I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas!

Christmas 2011

2011-12-19T17:32:00.001-08:00

Here is what our family and friends received in the mail this year.

Retro Kaleidoscope Christmas Card

Create personalized Christmas cards at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

The back of it had a small family picture and said, "Santa isn't the only one with a round belly this year. Trevor's brother is due in March."

I am beyond thrilled with the cards and have gotten countless compliments. I cant believe there will be two little boys on our card next year!!

Merry Christmas, to all of our blog readers. Your constant support and friendship means the world to me!

Infertility Scars

2011-12-17T17:05:00.000-08:00

I was planning on doing a post about how I am 29 weeks pregnant. About my OB appointment this week as well as my glucose test. I want to talk about where we will be living when baby comes. About my thoughts on 2011 ending and 2012 beginning.

And yet, tonight, I cant stop thinking about how much I hate infertility.

Yesterday marked one year since I had my first FET. I remember it like it was yesterday. I started meds for it on Trevor's 1st birthday. I was astonished by how easy it was compared to a full IVF cycle. Before I knew it, it was time for transfer. I was sure I'd be having the best Christmas ever. I had done everything right.

Ill never forget how much pain I felt as my wait went on. I knew pretty quickly that it didn't work. I sat in the car at the end of the night, Christmas Day, and sobbed.

Here I am, about a year later. I am baking a son and so happy about that. But, why was it so hard to get here?

I am dreading not being pregnant any more. I am fearful of what it will take to make a third child. Will we go through our 6 frozen embryos quickly? Will we need to use our final IVF cycle? Will I have another miscarriage or chemical pregnancy? So many questions..no answers.

I have not given up on my dream to have 5 children. I dont think I ever will. I look at Trevors face, amazed that Tom and I can make something so beautiful, and it hurts knowing we cant do it on our own.

I have always said, IF scars run deep. I dont know what kind of battle we will endure to get pregnant again, but I know I will do whatever it takes to make my dream come true.

2 Year Appointment

2011-12-11T19:42:00.000-08:00

Trevor had his 2 year appointment on Friday. My fave doctor was back from her maternity leave, so we were glad to see her! He weighed in at 28lb. 1oz. and was 35 and 1/4 inches! He is about 50% for weight and 75% for height. He got a great report and excelled in all of the developmental checkpoints. He was a little nervous when we talked about going to the doctor, but he was a total ham for the nurse and doc. He stayed so still when she examined him and listened to all of the instructions. We got him mostly dressed and waited for his shot. Once again, not a single tear. He didnt even wince or whimper..I think he has my high pain tolerance. They like to see the kids at 2.5 years, so hopefully we wont be back before then.

I did ask about about setting up new baby with their practice and she said someone will come see him in the hospital. We didnt have that with Trevor because he was in the NICU, so Im hoping she will be the one on staff that day.

Trevor has made huge strides forward with potty training the past week. He has been peeing and pooping on his potty every day, many times a day. We only do it while at home. He isnt quite ready to do the whole process in public yet. We have him wear his undies at home and make a big deal when he goes. He does this funny celebratory dance; Ill have to get in on camera! I am totally impressed with his progress and hope he stays interested.

These are the last bit of his 2 year pics. My faves. :)

28 Weeks! & Big Baby Update!

2011-12-09T17:59:00.000-08:00

How far along? 28 weeks, 3rd trimester! This is the week we went from thinking Trevor was a girl to finding out he was ALL BOY! There is no denying this little guy is a boy.

Total weight gain/loss: Im sticking with 10 lbs, let see what the docs scale says this week.

Maternity clothes? Yep, Ive been sticking with comfy pants when I can. Maternity jeans are such a nightmare.

Sleep: Weird dreams are back. And Ive ben kicking off my Snoogle in the middle of the night. It does help me fall asleep though.

Best moment this week: The constant kicks and jabs make every day great. :)

Movement: He is a maniac! He is often laying across and I feel feet on my side. Every once in a while, I'll feel something up high.

Food cravings: Hot chocolate & Chipotle(not together!)

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: Nope

Belly Button in or out? Flattening

What I miss: Wine, I could have used a large glass after that Polar Express trip!

What I am looking forward to: Birth!

Milestones: 3rd trimester!

So, I am totally in love with a name and I think its the one. A {minor} problem..Tom doesnt like it. I am hoping he will change his mind because I cant stop thinking about it.

This week, I have my regular 28 week appointment. I feel like I may be measuring small still. I compared some pics with Trevors and I am definetly smaller this time. We will see what the doc said. Its also my 1st appointment with the 4th and final doc. Then, I can start making me appts with my fave docs and hope s/he is there for delivery.

I also have my glucose test this week. Im not too worried about it.
We have our hospital tour scheduled for Saturday.

My 2 girlfriends are throwing me a shower. I think its going to be Feb 11th. I told them to keep it low key. I am looking forward to celebrating this little boy and hopefully getting some fun gifts since we have all the big stuff.

Ive been watching birth shows like crazy and seriously cant wait to tell my second story. I keep joking that it has to be better than last time. Less than 24 hours, please? No fevers and NICU time? A healthy baby in our own room? It would all be so surreal.

I had a photographer friend offer to take pics of the birth and after a lot of consideration, we are told her yes. Nothing too personal..I just want her to capture those moments of when he first comes out and also when Trevor walks in. I want to soak in those moments with Tom rather than have him holding the camera and videocamera. Im really excited about hope the timing will work out.

Holiday Happenings

2011-12-08T18:56:00.000-08:00

There are so many fun things to do around the holidays. I have a "bucket list" of what I wanted to do with Trevor before Christmas. So far, we are doing well! Last Friday, we went to the Museum of Science and Industry downtown. They have a Dr. Seuss holiday exhibit there now and the trees were beautiful!

Saturday afternoon, we had tickets to go on the Polar Express. Short story? It was a disaster. Long story? Why, let me tell you..

We invited our friends to come along, Logan being 9 days younger than Trevor and also loving trains. We were so amped..got matching jammies and had big plans for the day. It started with the story being read at the park district. Then, we went outside and waited for the train to come. Luckily, it wasn't a freezing cold day. Our train was delayed almost 30 minutes. Keeping 2, two year olds occupied while standing next to train tracks is not fun!

When we finally got on the train, we had to sit on the top. Its not exactly safe for young children, who try to hang over the edge and look at people below. Jen and I got a workout trying to keep the boys seated. I wasn't worried about it and said we would be sure to get on the train earlier on the way back. Yeah, right.

We arrive at the station and were under the impression that it would be decorated and we would have about 30 minutes to visit with Santa and have a snack. Because of the delay, they told us to hurry up because our train was departing in 10 minutes. They handed us a jug of milk and a bag with 2 cookies and we got in line for Santa. We were hoping to do individual pics with the boys, one together and one of each family. We were waiting in line, got a pic of each boy and Santa told Jason that he was in a rush, only one picture. COME ON!

Also while standing in line, Tom realized he lost his wallet. He felt his jacket pocket and darted out of the station. We had watched the train that dropped us off leave, so we were in a panic. Him losing his wallet with his ID and badge is a 30 day suspension and possible termination. We are being shoved out of the station and Tom is off trying to talk to a conductor. They told him the train went into the yard down the block to check there. We had to abandon Tom at the station, that was a 45 minute drive from home. He was sure the wallet fell out on the other train. Guess where we sat on the way back? On the top. I was so frustrated at this point. I went down to talk to one of the conductors and Tom finally got let into the yard. They searched and couldn't find his wallet. We were all hoping it was left in the car at the park district.

We finally got back and I ran to the car. There it was, inside a shopping bag. I was so relieved. I called Tom and Jason went to go pick him up. All of that stress and worry was for nothing. If that doesn't explain how out of it Tom has been lately, I don't know what does.

I was totally disappointed in the whole Polar Express experience. It wasn't cheap either. Then again, the boys had fun and were such a joy, and that is was really matters. Maybe we will skip it next year..

This weekend, we are going to Winter Wonderfest at Navy Pier-our FAVE holiday activity! We are also going to the Brookfield Zoo lights with my whole family. I love this time of year and its even better enjoying it with Trevor. Add in being pregnant and I am one happy Mama.

Draining Day

2011-12-06T18:43:00.000-08:00

Ive been away lately due to a death. Toms lifelong friend, Matt, passed away late Thursday. He just turned 26. Matt and Tom went to school together since preschool, played basketball and golf together and were caddys at a local golf course for years. He was a reader at our wedding. He had been battling cancer for about a year and a half. He beat it once and it came back a few months later. Tom has been his "keeper", as I called him, since the day he was diagnosed. He constantly visited, kept him laughing, took him out of the house, asked for updates and was there for him. Matt took a turn for the worse about 2 weeks ago. They found out the cancer spread and there was nothing they could do. He started having seizures and was back and forth from the hospital and home. Thursday, they sent him home on hospice and he died hours later.

Tom had seen him the Saturday before and could tell it was the end. We planned on visiting him Friday evening as a family. We were downtown at the museum when we got the call. Tom has been beating himself up about not going to see him Thursday night, but no one knew he would be gone so soon.

Its been a hard week. I have never seen my husband cry so much. I think its hard for him to feel the pain as a young man the same age as Matt and also as a father. I have never felt so helpless. There is nothing I can say or do to make it better.

The wake was last night and it was beautiful. We brought Trevor with and he was great. He got to meet a lot of people for the first time. We left him behind for the funeral today. Tom was a pall bearer. The service was very nice, but terribly sad. No one should have to attend a funeral for a 26 year old. No Mother should ever have to bury her son. No wife should have to watch her husband suffer like I did today.

I can only imagine the pain his family will feel through the holidays and every day from now on. Its another reminder of how short life is and that you are not guaranteed tomorrow.

Because this needs to end on a bright note, here is Trevor testing out his new umbrella, or umblella, as he says. I couldn't possibly love him more than I do today.

Big Cousin

2011-11-30T08:10:00.000-08:00

This big cousin..

is going to make..
a fabulous..

big brother!

Trevor-2, Rylan almost 5 months <3

Trevor Boy

2011-11-29T11:42:00.000-08:00

Trevor, my Trevor. This kid couldn't be any better. I seriously look at him and wonder how we got so lucky. There have been some "notable" happenings lately, so I thought Id write them here.

*At Thanksgiving, my cousins new-er fiance was there and my Mom was telling her about the kids. She said, "Yes, Trevor and Tyler..Trouble" Trevor looked up and said, "We not twouble!"

*He has been playing with my belly lately. He will kiss it and tickle it and play hide and seek with brother. If you ask if there is a baby in his belly, he says yes!

*Trevor always wakes up happy, but today, he was yelling for me and I couldn't quite make out what he was saying. I walked into his room and he said, "Mama, my pants fell down! My pants fell down!" He had on two piece jammies that are size 3T. Apparently they're still a bit big.

*He has been crazy for books lately. Ive been trying to cut some TV time out of the day, which is tough with the winter coming. Instead of putting on a little show before bed, we have been playing or reading. Last night, we read about 10 books and he sat and enjoyed each one. He is in love with his Snappy Sounds pop up books. However, he wont let you read just one. You have to read all 6 that he owns for him to be satisfied.

*He is loving Christmas so far! We look for lights when were driving, listen to Christmas music in the car. His fave songs so far are Drummer Boy and Jingle Bells. We decorated over the weekend and he loves looking at the ornaments. He met Santa at the mall and didnt cry. He says Ho, ho, ho and jiggles his belly like Santa.

*Yesterday, at Hallmark, he was asking me a question about the recordable books. A woman stopped and asked how old he was. I told her and she was so surprised. She said she works with 2 year olds and his language is very advanced. My heart filled with pride. Tell me my kid is cute and I will agree..tell me he is advanced in development and I feel like were doing something right. :)

*We have a new thing where we go back and forth saying, I love you so much. I will say it and then he will say it back. Sometimes, its, I love you the most. I love hearing it all day long.

*I signed him up for a My Gym session when they ran a Groupon for it. Normally, I would never pay $17 for each class, so when I saw they had 4 classes and a lifetime membership for $49, I bought it. He has been doing it Monday mornings and he LOVES it. I feel terrible now, but there's no way I will sign him up to continue. He has one last class next week. He loves the monkey on the walls and now knows how to flex his muscles.

*I am hoping to get a few passes to fun places this Christmas, rather than more toys. Our children's museum pass expires in Feb, we will need a new zoo pass and one to the arboretum would be great. Even movie tix or a day pass to a local kids play place..we are filled to the max with toys after this birthday. And those are the gifts that keep on giving. I will sign him up for a few classes before baby comes..I think swim again and an ABC class on Fridays. We will see, once I figure out my work schedule.

*He is finally back to being cooperative at brushing his teeth. He did awesome from a young age and then a few months ago, he started fighting it. Now, he sits right down, lets us brush and then brushes himself. Ahh, its bliss.

*He has been a little under the weather for a few days. Tom is taking him in this afternoon to have his ears and lungs checked. Saturday night he was super warm and coughing a ton, so I pulled him into bed with me. He slept like a rock next to his Mama. But, that kid sure moves a lot. I woke up here and there and at one point, he was up against the headboard with his butt in the air. I'm glad he got some great sleep that night and I loved waking up next to him.

*Trevor is not very concerned about our daily plans. If we are getting dressed, he asks where we are going. He asks about 100 times while in the car. He also wants to know where Daddy is, when he is not with us.

*Here are some more of his 2 year old pictures. The last set I am saving until after we send out our Christmas cards. :) I cant stop wondering if Squishy baby will look just like him!

26 Weeks!

2011-11-26T13:58:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving

How far along? 26 Weeks, almost 3rd trimester!

Total weight gain/loss: I think were at almost 10 lbs. I have totally gained since my last appointment. It may be due to the fact that my Mom and Sissy made me my fave choco eclair cake to fatten little man up. :)

Maternity clothes? Yep, hoping to buy a few cute shirts to get thru to the end.

Sleep: Better, thankfully! I went Black Friday shopping till 2:30 am and Tom let me sleep until 11am, it was awesome!

Best moment this week: Having Thanksgiving as a reminder of how thankful I am to have this year ending on a good note..

Movement: Yes! He has been dancing on my bladder and laying sideways. I feel little feet sticking out of my sides on a regular basis.

Food cravings: Egg nog, but I love that every holiday season.

Gender: A boy!

Labor Signs: I have been having a contraction here and there. I have gut feeling this boy will come early. It may just be wishful thinking. No one likes to be overdue.

Belly Button in or out? In, but, flattening out.

What I miss: Being able to breathe! Since last Sunday, I have been super short of breath. I think he is really going through a growth spurt and movin' on up!

What I am looking forward to: Picking a name. When, oh when, will that day come!?

Weekly Wisdom: Pregnancy FLIES when youre occupied by a toddler.

Milestones: I think there is officially no mistaking I am pregnant.

Brady's Irish dance competition

Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T14:09:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I thought about making a list of all I have the be thankful for this year. Somehow, it all revolves around my 3 men. A phenomonal husband who I crazy in love with, a 2 year old boy, who makes my heart want to explode when I look at him, and a baby boy, whos been cooking in my belly for 26 weeks. My heart is full, as my plate will be tonight.

Too Much

2011-11-21T18:36:00.000-08:00

There is so much going on right now, I cant even think straight. Weve had work, extra work, my Uncle passed away(more on that later), Toms buddy with cancer was told theres nothing they can do, were waiting on the appraisal for the house, more celebrating for Trevors birthday, Tylers birthday, the beginning of Christmas shopping, minimal sleep, etc!

Here are some pics from the two other birthday celebrations we had. We had some friends over for a Bear game the weekend of his birthday. It was an absolute blast. This past Saturday, we had a family thing for both boys and that was great too. He is now a professional present opener and our house is toyland.

This is Trevors bff-Logan. He is 9 days younger. :)

Now, about my Uncle. My cousin got married last August. He is older-42 and his wife is 41. They went straight to IVF and were due with a girl Dec. 4th. My Mom called me on Thursday and said she was getting induced that day due to low fluid. She ended up having a c-section and baby girl is perfect. This baby is my Uncles granddaughter. He went to the hospital Friday and held her for a while. As he was leaving the hospital, he dropped dead. Like, collapsed and was gone before they had a second to help him. How crazy is that? I am not a big believer in fate and I hate the saying of its meant to be..but, I cant help but think that baby girl knew she had to come out so her Grandpa could hold her. His wake is tomorrow and funeral Wednesday. I feel terrible for my cousins, who had the happiest day on Thursday and 24 hours later were planning their fathers funeral. At least he got to meet that little girl..

Now, I need to go try to cheer my husband up. This will be a challenge. :/

Measuring Behind

2011-11-16T19:01:00.000-08:00

I had an OB appointment this morning. It seems like I go and have zero questions, or I have a list of them. Today, I had a list.

I asked about the prescription prenatals Id been taking. They're $15 for a 30 day supply. She said they're not necessary and any prenatal would be fine. Great!

She confirmed I have a yeast infection. Not so great. I started monistat tonight.

I asked about how late I can travel. We were invited to go to Florida in late January, nearly free of charge. We decided(after looking at outrageous flight costs!) that its just cutting it too close. We just may be stuck in IL until we are a family of 4.

I told her about my lack of sleep. She said I could take Benadryl. A small amount, about 25 mg. The only liquid one at the store was children's..so I bought that. I wont try it out until this weekend. I have never taken anything to help me sleep, so I have no clue how it will affect me.

The biggest talk of the appointment was my size. I have only gained 4 lbs according to their scale. Plus, my belly was measuring behind. She didn't say how much behind, just that we would monitor it closely. I explained that I only gained 20 lbs with Trevor and he was almost half of that! The only difference is that he never measured behind. It makes me a little nervous. I have to wait 4 weeks and hope that little man has caught up by then! If not, I'm sure they will do a growth ultrasound. The only thing giving me peace of mind is that he measured spot on 4 weeks ago at my 20 week ultrasound. The thought of having a small baby after delivering the big kahuna that is T, makes my mind spin!

Tom is nervous. He kept trying to get me to call and ask how far behind I am. He watched me eat my dinner and has been pushing ice cream in my face. Haha

I made my 28 week appointment and got the orders for my glucose test. I cant believe we are that far into this pregnancy! In a matter of 3 days, in December, Ill have both appointments and we will do our hospital tour. We are at a different hospital than I had Trevor at and I want to know where my baby will be if he is ever in the nursery. And I might as well see where the NICU is because you just never know.

I also scheduled Trevor a big brother class for January. Its just 30 minutes on a Saturday and its made for kids younger than 3. He is supposed to bring a stuffed animal and they will explain how to treat a new baby.

3 and a half months to go until he is here..still surreal.

Trevors 2nd Birthday

2011-11-16T10:57:00.000-08:00

Trevor's birthday came and the day went too fast, just as the past 2 years have. He woke up and played a bit. We dressed him in his birthday shirt my sister ordered him and took his picture at 8:18am, the minute he was born. :)

We took a quick trip to get donuts and a balloon. We let him choose ANY balloon. There were huge $15 ones that talked every time you hit it. Trevor chose the tiny one attached to a stick. My wallet thanked him.

We dropped my car off to be detailed and were on the road to our first stop. We wanted to do something fun and new and decided on Make a Messterpiece. It was $15 for 2 play stations, along with 3 stations open to all kids. We had a ton of fun.

This was bubble painting. You put your paper in the middle and pushed a big red button to make colorful bubbles come out.

This was ball painting and his favorite!

Holding up his 2 fingers..or trying to.

This was the drumming station. It was like Blue Man Group for little kids and it was adorable.

We stopped by my parents and picked up his balloons. He did not want his picture taken with them.

Trevor napped all afternoon and we woke him up to go to dinner at the Choo Choo Restaurant. We haven't been in about 6 months and he is very into trains now, so it was perfect.

After the restaurant, we had some friends and family by for cake and presents. We set Trevor's up while he was napping, so we came home and they were all ready.

The drums are from us and he is crazy about them!

He did awesome opening his gifts. He would hold them up for us to see and he didn't fight me when I would move something to the side so he can open the next one.

It was such a great day. Tom and I were lucky enough to be off work this year and last. Trevor will always have the day off, due to Veterans Day. You're welcome, son.

The celebrating continued and we had a Bears party on Sunday. This Saturday, we are doing a family party for Trevor and Tyler, who turns 3 this Friday.

Now, we need to find somewhere to put all of these toys..

24 Weeks!

2011-11-12T19:53:00.000-08:00

How far along? 24 Weeks!! aka SIX months pregnant!
Total weight gain/loss: 8 pounds
Maternity clothes? Always pants, shirts are about 50/50
Sleep: Not happening and its starting to wear on me. I have these nasty dreams and toss and turn all night.
Best moment this week: Big brothers birthday
Movement: All the time!!
Food cravings: Ice cream, I may or may not have 5 different flavors in my freezer right now..
Gender: A boy! That remains nameless.
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In, but changing
What I miss: Sleep!
What I am looking forward to: Holding him! Its going to be here before we know it!
Weekly Wisdom: If you go to Target on a Saturday night, expect to toss a few unnecessary food items in your cart. ;)
Milestones: Viability!

Any advice on the sleep? I have a snoogle so my body is more comfortable. Its whats going on in my head that I cant turn off! I plan to ask the OB on Wednesday if there's anything I can take to see if it helps.

I have been getting lots of comments about how small I am. I remember feeling this way with Trevor and then BAM, I was huge.

I need a bigger diaper bag for 2 boys that will need food/drinks/diapers. Anyone love their diaper bag?

Im excited to spend the holidays pregnant. Part of me wishes he was here to spend them with us, but he needs to bake a while longer and we can enjoy him next year.

Im having tons of thoughts on baby #3(or #4 if you count the miscarriage). That's a whole 'nother post..

Happy Birthday, TMR!

2011-11-11T03:47:00.000-08:00

Trevor Michael-

Happy 2nd Birthday, sweet boy! I find it hard to believe that you have been in our life for 24 full months. And yet, I have no clue what we did before that day! This past year has been nothing short of perfect. You make an ordinary day extraordinary, just by being you.

You have gone from a crawling one year old and have become a walking, climbing, running, fast two year old! You love going to the park and have mastered every kind of ladder, rock wall and rope course. You like going down the slides, but always ask to be caught. You do not care for the baby swing. You will tolerate the big swing on my lap for a few minutes. You do enjoy the big swing by yourself, as long as I dont push too high. We try to stop at a park even for 30 minutes on a nice day. We have a long winter ahead of us and we want all the outside time we can get. You are so funny about the weather. You immediately tell me if its raining out. If its windy, you like to wear a hat or hood. You tell me you're cold and to put the air on in the car. Don't worry, I know you mean warm air. I wonder what you will think of snow this year.

You talk. All day long. Strangers always comment on your speech. You speak in full sentences. You will repeat yourself until we understand. You recently started asking why questions. If I ask you a question, you will often say, Be-tuz(because). Daddy will ask you about your day when he gets home and you are very accurate to tell him what we did. Your memory is impeccable. Last week, we were about to pull into the YMCA parking lot for swim class. You shrieked and said, I go swimming, Mama. I see the baket-ball. You recognized the building we walk into and you know we always pass the basketball games and have to stop and see. I asked you what you wanted for dinner when we were getting dressed and you said pizza. Yes, son, we always have pizza on swim night.

Speaking of swim, you are our little fishy! You love the water and are fearless. You like to dunk your head under and can hold your breath for about 15 seconds. You enjoy your bath every other day. We always make it fun with toys and music and bubbles.

You are learning a lot right now. ABCs, colors, shapes and numbers. Your favorite color is blue and you know your name starts with T. You get about half of your colors/shapes right. You can count to 11 and you can sing your ABCs. You recognized letters everywhere and point them out to me.

Trevor, you love books. We have been reading to you since you were very small and it has paid off. You enjoy our bedtime stories, but sometimes you will stop playing with toys and just sit and ask to be read to for a while. You will read to yourself, too. You have a few favorites, Goodnight Gorilla..you laugh at the part with the wife's eyes open. You are obsessed with your two monster books. You can recite one from start to finish. You have moved onto the bigger hardcover books more than the board books. Oh, and the lift the flap books and pop up books are loved very much.

You are still my rockstar sleeper. You go to bed between 7:30-8pm. You brush your teeth, get a few stories, get nah-nee(pacifier) and your Bear and you are out. You still sleep in your crib. You move a ton while you sleep. You still haven't tried to climb out of your crib, so I think we will keep you there for a while. You get up anywhere between 7:30 and 8:30. You wake up with a smile and call for me. Recently, I have been pulling you into bed with me and we snuggle before we start our day. You leave nah-nee and bear in your crib and we start our day together. You take a 2-3 hour nap in the afternoon. You are very flexible as to when you go to sleep. It could be 11:30am or as late as 1pm. You love your sleep. You can be in the middle of playing your favorite game and if I ask if you want to go to bed, you drop what you're doing and are ready.

You love music, Trev. You enjoy playing with your instruments. You listen to your CD's in the car. It amazed me how quickly you can pick up lyrics. You will listen to a song one time and when its done, I hear you singing it in the back seat! Your current favorites are Hakuna Matata, Elmos song, Baby Beluga, Twinkle Twinkle, Happy Birthday, etc. Daddy started to whistle the tune of a song and you fill in the words!

You have a lot of favorite toys right now. You love trains. You are doing a ton of pretend play. You cook on your grill. You like building towers. You can sit and play with "guys" like a big boy. You really entertain yourself. Yet, you play well with other kids and sometimes you ask one of us to get down on the floor and play too.

You are very polite and it makes Mama so proud. You say please and thank you. If someone is in your way, you say excuse me. Daddy taught you to say bless you when someone sneezes.

You are such a compassionate boy. If a baby or child is crying, you tend to them and say, "it okay, baby." If someone is hurt, you are there as fast as you can. The funniest thing is when I stub my toe or trip on something, you drop to the floor to kiss anywhere that hurts. The other day, I said I had a headache. You ran to me as fast as you could and said, "I tiss it, Mama." You like when we return the favor. If you get an ouchie, you want it kissed as soon as possible. You're starting to like having a cold pack when you get hurt. You've only needed bandaids a few times and aren't obsessed with those yet.

There are certain characters you've grown to love. You like Curious George and the Cat in the Hat. Of course, you love all things Disney. Nemo and Dory are huge. You watched Lion King for the first time this week and you went nuts over it. We let you watch a 30 minute show after you get up, before breakfast. Usually, we let you watch a bit before bed. For a few months, Mama and Daddy were catching up on a series called Lost. We wouldn't watch it in front of you, but may have been turning it off after a nap. You started to request Lost as your show and it was so funny. We let you sit and finish an episode and sure enough, you sat and enjoyed it.

You are a pretty good eater. You love almost all fruit and eat some at every meal. Vegetables are rare. Breakfast is the easiest, you love waffles, cereal, oatmeal, everything. You eat a lot of pasta and chicken. Its always exciting when we come across something new you love. Fish sticks was the most recent. You're our little dipper. You love every type of condiment..ketchup, mustard, sour cream, cream cheese, barbeque sauce. And yes, you love pickles. For dessert, ice cream is a favorite and you could always go for a lollipop.

You have a great relationship with your cousins. You light up when you see them. You still bully Tyler a bit, only because he lets you get away with anything. You are sweet with Rylan and always give her kisses. You adore Mikey and Brady and follow them around every chance you get. You love Delaney too, you always let her carry you around. She is like your second Mommy.

I love watching you with our family members. You have brought so much joy to everyones life. You make family events more fun and keep everyone laughing at you. Yes, you like attention.

We are a very active family and rarely have free time. We always try to take advantage of our time together and explore fun places. Summer is our favorite time, since we can enjoy everything outside and we basically live at the cottage. You love the cottage and know anything goes while we are there.

Daddy and I try to give you a lot of opportunities to be active. You took gymnastics most of the year, swim class in the winter and you recently joined a soccer class. You love to shoot hoops at home and are quite the tumbler. I think Daddy wants you to be a football player and has been practicing tackling with you.

We went on a few family vacations this year. We went to the Dells in December. You and I flew down to Georgia to visit your friends, AB&C in January and again in August. I cherished those quick trips with you. In October, we took a week long, family vacation to Southern California. Daddy and I had the best time with you! You were an amazing traveler and had so much fun at all the parks we visited. It was a little bittersweet coming home, as we knew it was the last time we would be alone on vacation.

We've been a family of 3 for a while now and come February/March, we will welcome your little brother. Daddy and I were so excited when we found out our new baby was a boy. You are lucky to be given a brother close in age. You will be the best of friends, I am sure.

I have such big dreams and hopes for your life, Trevor. I promise to stand by you every single day for the rest of my life. No one will ever love you more than I do. You will always be my baby.

Thank you for making me your Mama and making all of my dreams come true!

Mama

PS-Your birthday this year is 11/11/11. As if you werent cool enough already..;)

Shutterfly Winners!

2011-11-08T21:06:00.001-08:00

Drumroll please..

I used random.org(and couldnt figure out how to prove it here!) and the winners are:

1)Dave and Elaine
2)The Marshall Family
3)Jenn and Valerie

Congratulations! You have 48 hours to email me at TERobertson18@aol.com to get your code.

Due Date

2011-11-07T20:17:00.000-08:00

Today is Trevors due date. November 7th, 2009. Its a day that means almost as much to me as his birthday.

When going through fertility treatments, I would always calculate my due date while waiting to find out if it worked. I would think of the holidays close to the date..think of all the positives that came with the season..dream about the day I would officially be assigned a due date for healthy baby growing inside me.

Finally, in March '09, I was given that beautiful date. November 7th. I wondered if he would come early and be here by Halloween! I looked forward to having him around for Thanksgiving and Christmas. When the day came and went, I wondered if he would ever come out. He did. And life has been beautiful every day since.

Sneak peek of his 2 year pics!

23 Weeks & A Secret

2011-11-06T09:27:00.000-08:00

How far along? 23 Weeks!!
Total weight gain/loss: 6 pounds
Maternity clothes? Still not many shirts
Sleep: TERRIBLE! I cant get comfortable, I want to sleep on my stomach and I have bad dreams. I went and got a Snoogle on Friday night, and its been better since then.
Best moment this week: Seeing baby boy move
Movement: As soon as I wake up, throughout the day and mostly at night!
Food cravings: Chocolate, thank you Halloween
Gender: A boy!
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: I could go for a beer.
What I am looking forward to: Viability next week
Weekly Wisdom: Things have a way of falling into place..
Milestones: Seeing movement from the outside

The most recent belly pics are from 2 weeks ago, at Rylans baptism. Tom is at work and I am in yoga pants and a hoodie. They will have to do. :)

My whole fam before we left the church.

Rylan didnt care for pictures when we got home..

Shes a deer in headlights here, but isnt her headpiece gorgeous? That was one of our special gifts to her. I cant wait for my future daughter to wear that outfit one day!

Delaney is always ready to pose with me!-my 1st Goddaughter.

6 fingers for 6 years of loving her! I still cant believe how much she looks like me. And my babies come out looking like TOM!

As many know, my blog BFF, Evan is pregnant and due a day after me. She and her husband decided not to find out what they are having. She had her ultraound a few weeks ago and her friend, Alicia went with. Alicia was told what the baby is! Evan wrote two letters to me, one from a baby boy and one from a baby girl. Alicia put the proper one in the mail and destroyed the other. So, me and Alicia are the only two people that know the sex of that sweet, growing baby. The letter is something I will treasure forever and I am honored Evan gave me this special gift. Now, Alicia and I can do some shopping and Evan will have a box full of pink or blue goodies on delivery day.

Dont forget to leave a comment for my Shutterfly giveaway below! It ends on Tuesday! I will do an updated name post when it closes.

Halloween Activities

2011-11-03T18:40:00.000-07:00

We had the BEST Halloween this year. Honestly, by the time Monday rolled around, I was kind of sick of the holiday. We had six activities this year and wore 3 costumes! I bought an owl costume(my fave, you will die!) at Spirit. I figure this is the last year I get to choose what he is so I wanted something cute and cuddly. We used my nephews old monkey costume twice and my sister wanted Tyler and Trevor to match so we grabbed monster costumes for $8 on clearance at the last minute. With so many places to wear the costumes, I'm glad we had some variety.

He wore the monkey to boo at the zoo. We went with 3 other families and had so much fun. I love having friends with kids. I always stop to think how grown up it makes me feel. :) Here are the kids, all boys!, at the zoo. 3/5 are monkeys! He also wore this to trick or treat in downtown Naperville. I didn't take a single picture because it was chaos! It was so crowded and windy, we only stayed about 45 minutes.

Trevor wore his owl costume to Delaney's Halloween birthday party a few weeks back. I have to go off topic for a second here-So, Delaney's birthday is the 24th and my sister has always thrown her a Halloween party. This year, she gave her to choice to have the Halloween party or a school friend party at the local jumpy place. Delaney went back and forth for weeks and decided to have the school friends. She had that party on Friday night. On Saturday, my sister had her Uncle take her out shopping and we all gathered for a surprise, bonus Halloween party. She pulled up in the car, tons of her friends and family lined up in costumes. She was beaming from inside the car. She got out, crying, wrapped her arms around my sister and said, "Thank you, Mommy!" It was the sweetest thing. My tough as nails, 6 year old niece, was so appreciative. It got everyone teary eyed. She ran inside to get into her costume and the party was ON!!

Anyway, Trevor was a hit in his costume. Yes, those are Tom shoes. He is a very hip boy.

We went to a local park districts party last week. We did some indoor trick or treating, crafts, games, a cookie walk and had a snack. It was very cute and again, people went nuts over his costume. He was the youngest one there and blended well with the big kids!

Trevor wore his warm monster costume to another themed birthday party the Saturday before. He was so excited when we bought it and wanted to put it on in the store. His obsession for monsters is out of control!

Getting monster tips from one of his fave books..

Halloween was such a blast. Trevor took a nice long nap and we waited for Tom to come home. We drove over to my sisters where all the kids were ready to go. Trevor totally knew what to do. Delaney and Brady were super helpful too. Some of the houses had a lot of stairs; they would grab a piece and save Trev the trip up! Sam brought me hot chocolate, so me and Squishy were extra happy. Tom snuggled Rylan, it wasn't too cold, we ordered delicious pizza, the night couldn't have been better.

Last, but not least, Rylan in her pumpkin costume. I got my sister addicted to Etsy..oops. ;)

Next up in this house? TREVOR'S 2ND BIRTHDAY! One week left of my one year old...

Wrapping It Up

2011-11-02T11:05:00.000-07:00

We have been back from vacation for far too long to still be posting about it. We've been on the go since our return. Then again, when are we not?! I want to skip forward to November, since its a BIG month in our house. Give me a post or two and Ill get there.

Our last full day in San Diego was spent at the zoo! We had another day of perfect weather and I found a discount for our tix, so I was happy they actually worked. :) The zoo is HUGE. And hilly. I was beyond exhausted from the week and I only brought flip flops. My feet hurt, I had a headache(luckily the only day while there!) and I was huffing and puffing up the hills. A pregnant person did not design the zoo. Our tickets included the sky tram and the double decker bus tour. That helped up see a ton of animals. We missed out on feeding the giraffes, which I was pretty sad about. We will have to roadtrip to Indianapolis this summer to feed them there.

We made sure to see the animals we dont have at our local zoos...koalas, panda bears and elephants. Trevor had tons of fun and cant seem to get enough of animals. It prompted me to buy him a LP zoo for his birthday.

Teddy gram face on the bus!

We had his hand print made into a monkey for his room. It turned out so cute. Ill have to get a pic of the complete project.

We were walking and behind us was this! They were moving him to another cage. Apparently him and the white dog are BFF's. How cool is that?

If I had known that these little pennies would bring Trevor so much joy, we would have been getting them all along. He loved his pennies!

We barely ate at the zoo and decided that since it was our last night and Sweetest Day, we would splurge on a nice dinner. We went to Outback and it was delicious! We happened to dine right next to a Target, that was 2 floors. I have quite a relationship with Target and you better believe I had Tom fill a cart just so we could put it down the escalator. And I took pics on my phone. Such a tourist..

We packed our things and had another early day of travel. We dropped our rental car, hung at the airport and were on a non stop at 6:30am. Trevor was wonderful for the flight and we soaked it in; his last free flight! It was nice to get home at noon, Chicago time and have the rest of the day to unpack, do laundry and grocery shop.

I cant even put into words how special this trip was for us. Tom and I are very involved with our friends and families. Its rare that we have time with just the 3 of us. This is probably the last time Trevor will have a full week of both of us to himself. None of our other kids will get that. One thing I will always remember is that when we would be waiting in lines, Trevor was often in our arms. He would pull our heads together and say "Fam tiss!" That means family kiss and all 3 of us smooch. We do this at home often and this was the first time Trevor would suggest it. It was so sweet..like he was saying thank you for bringing me to such a fun place!

I think there may be a tiny trip or two between now and next October. Our bi-annual trip to DisneyWorld is being planning this week. What can I say? We love the mouse.

Shutterfly Giveaway!

2011-11-01T18:44:00.000-07:00

I love Shutterfly. Simple as that. I use the site weekly to upload pictures and have 4 X 6's sent to update Trevor's baby book. I am always happy with the quality of the prints. I have used instant machines when in a rush and am never satisfied with how they turn out. I am part of the club where I always get a discount on prints. The only pictures I do not print are his professional ones taken every 6 months. Those, I make into a book and I have a nice collection of his newborn, 6 month, year, and 18 month shoots. We just did his 2 year pics on Friday and I cant wait to add to the collection. http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-books

I give a yearly calendar to my Mom as a Christmas gift. I put pictures of the whole family and tons of the kids. You can include special dates like birthdays and anniversaries and even add quotes to make it more personal. Its always her favorite gift. :) It takes time for me to choose the pics and make it ours, but once you load it into the website, its as simple as a few clicks. Here is the link: http://www.shutterfly.com/calendars/wall-calendars I just started working on this last week!

I am most excited about ordering Christmas cards this year! We have sent one out using Shutterfly every year since we got married. It started as a picture of the two of us. In 2009, we sent a birth announcement/Christmas card in one. Last year, we had my favorite card with just Trevor. Like I said, we took pictures on Friday and I am anxious to see how they look. I'm not sure if it will be a picture of Trevor alone, one of the three of us..or maybe both! Either way, I cant wait to sign it from our family of soon to be 4! Here is the main page, feel free to browse! http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery

Here are some of my favorite cards. I wont decide until I see the pictures. I am hoping to have them ordered by next weekend.

Shutterfly has given me some free cards to try this year(THANK YOU!!) AND they have offered me 3 sets of 25 cards to give away to my readers! This is my first ever giveaway so I am pumped! All you have to do it leave me a comment. I am asking that you leave me your favorite boy name. I am trying to get some new ideas for our cookin' boy..we are coming up with nothing we love! So, leave me a quick comment of what you would name your son if he was born tomorrow? I will randomly pick winners and 3 of you will get 25 free cards. Woo hoo!! I will leave it open for one week and close it at 9pm, November 8th.

Good luck to all!

Happy Halloween!

2011-10-31T11:49:00.000-07:00

Last night, we kept up our bi-annual tradition of painting my pregnant belly. I hope this continues at least until I am 30. ;)

Here is my 2009 Trevor belly, at 38 weeks pregnant.

Here is my 2011, nameless boy belly at 22 weeks pregnant.

I think the bump on the left is cuter...

Trevor is napping and we will head to my sisters to trick or treat when Tom gets home from work. Its a nice day here but will be chilly when the sun goes down.

I hope everyone has a fun and safe Halloween!

SeaWorld

2011-10-26T17:25:00.000-07:00

We went to Seaworld on the Friday of our vacation. We had to fax over the house papers from the hotel and then we were off. First, we went to feed the dolphins because they only offered it twice a day. Trevor didn't want to feed them himself, but he thought they were pretty cool.

The whole day, we would see a few animals and then see a show. Repeat times 2. Trevor loved the penguins, any fish that resembled Dory or Nemo and the Beluga whales. That's still one of his favorite songs.

Here, he is showing the sea turtle his turtle tattoo :)

The first show we saw was the sea lion/otter show. They couldn't get the second sea lion to go off stage, so he was part of the show even though he shouldn't have been. It was pretty funny and they did a good job just going with it. My favorite part is the cute litter otters popping in and out.

After that, we did run straight to get a seat for the Shamu show. I wanted Trevor to grasp how big they were, so we sat toward the back of the soak zone. The show was awesome, even with them not getting in the water with the whales. We made it to the very end and then got one huge splash and got soaked. Trevor did not care for that.

We went to the Elmo play land next. Trevor jumped around and had fun with some other kids for a while.

We went to the arctic area and saw the -luga's(as Trevor calls them), polar bears and penguins.

Trevor fell asleep after that and we decided to go on the sky tram. He stayed asleep as we got on, but he woke up quickly. That day, he only got about a 20 minute nap and he was still such a good boy.

San Diego is just beautiful!

The next show was very good! It had dolphins, birds, tons of acrobats and pilot whales. We also saw a pet show with dogs, cats, a kangaroo, pigs, etc. and that was a big hit!

Tom and I both thought we like the Seaworld Orlando a little bit better, but we still had a great time. Can you tell I was lazy with the camera this day? Too much water for my comfort zone..;)

In other news, we had the inspection of the house tonight and it seemed to go well. Now we finish up with the mortgage documents and hope to close on November 15th!

Day 3 and Ultrasound

2011-10-25T07:49:00.000-07:00

We hung out with Toms Aunt and Uncle in the morning on Thursday. I had met his Uncle while he was in town recently, but never had the chance to meet his Aunt Melissa. They were so kind and cute with Trevor. They have 4 cats, so Trevor was in heaven. Melissa was heading out of town herself, so we left before lunch and went to In and Out Burger. Tom had never been, he is now a big fan. As we left there, I realized we left Trevors beloved bear at their house! Luckily, they had a code we could use to run in and grab it. Crisis averted! We drove down to San Diego while Trevor napped.

Our SD hotel was not nearly as nice as our Anaheim one. It was just a room. We were spoiled the first few days. We went in the pool for a bit, but there were bees around so we didnt stay long. We went to the downtown area to explore and get some fresh air.

Could he be any more handsome? His shirt is SO accurate, too. ;)

I was craving Panera and thanks to my wonderful Iphone, I found there was on minutes from where we were. We had a big dinner and found out that night that they accepted our offer on the house we put a bid on. The realtor emailed me the papers we needed to sign, so we knew we had to take care of that in the morning before our fun began.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before too much time goes by, I want to mention my ultrasound I had last week. We had a late evening appointment and left Trevor behind to go to bed. We had our normal 20 week ultrasound and I was 20 weeks 5 days pregnant. The ultrasound was awesome! It was the most detailed u/s I have ever had. The doc didnt just measure what he needed. He took the time to point out every single thing to us. He is so fun and friendly and enthusiastic. Everything on baby boy was perfect and measuring spot on. All the measurements were either 20w4d, 20w5d or 20w6d. He said up to 10 days before or after is normal and we were within one day. I was relieved he isnt huge..yet. And he is still a boy, very much so. He kept flashing his goods. He has an adorable profile and Trevors nose. He was sucking his thumb, which I was so excited about. Trevor never did that on any ultrasound. We love him so much and were happy he is growing as he should be!

Left is his profile and right is his boy part profile..haha

Disneyland

2011-10-23T17:54:00.000-07:00

Wednesday, we headed to Disneyland! We got up, had breakfast at the hotel, checked out and drove to the park. It was HOT that day, ended up being 104 degrees! And it was super crowded, which I was not expecting. We still managed to have another great day.

We went right to the Haunted Mansion ride to get a fast pass. Because it is October, it had an extra long line. I didn't know that the mansion there is Nightmare before Xmas themed, it was so cool! We went on the Winnie the Pooh ride and then Tom went on Splash Mountain before it was time for our fast pass. Trevor was scared in Haunted Mansion, but he did not cry. He simply put his head on my chest and wouldn't lift it until we were off the ride.

We went in the Tiki Room and on the Jungle Cruise. We met Aladdin and Jasmine and decided to head to Toon Town to meet the characters before Trevor fell asleep.

On the way, we stopped at Pinocchio and Snow White. Then, we went on the Rodger Rabbit ride and the line was the longest we waited for! We finally arrived at Mickey and Minnies houses.

Trevor fell asleep, so Tom went on Space Mountain and I tried to stay in the shade and cool off. We went through at least 6 water bottles per day and Tom pushed me drinking a ton. I felt like we were running out of time, so after a little over an hour, we woke Trevor up and got in line for the Nemo ride. We felt bad, but he woke up to an ice cream, so it went a-okay!

Next, Tom and Trevor went on the car ride. I went up the exit ramp to watch them. As I stood there, unable to ride because I am pregnant, it occurred to me..my baby boy is grown up. Trevor met the height requirement to ride with Daddy. I watched them interact while waiting in line. It made my heart break a little to think how recently he was a newborn and now he is riding rides without his Mama! They had a blast on the ride.

We went back to ride Its a Small World. That was by far, Trevor's favorite ride! He was singing along by the time we were at the end. He was happily yelling more!

Signing more, just to be sure we knew what he wanted!

We went by the castle to take some pictures before it got too dark.

I got stopped every 10 feet because of my shirt. Everyone said how cute it was and wanted to know where I got it. I have to admit, I love it too! It says Embrace your bump, in case its hard to read.

We ate a late dinner and went back to ride Small World again. We ran to ride Peter Pan and made it just in time. We went on Main Street so I could grab souvenirs. I got each of the kids something and somehow, we ended up only getting Trevor a light up Buzz and a zip up(that is ridiculously cute!) that he will get for his bday. We got Squishy his first stuffed animal, a Goofy! I felt bad for not getting more, but consider myself lucky that Trevor isn't at the age where he wanted everything!

We were so tired when we left and we still had to drive an hour to Toms Uncles house. We arrive at like 10:30 and Trevor and I went straight to bed.

Disneyland was wonderful. I had low expectations because everyone said world is so much better. I was pleasantly surprised at how great both Disneyland and Cali Adventure were. I am so glad we decided to go there during our trip.

Days 1 & 2

2011-10-21T12:05:00.000-07:00

We started our vacation by getting up at 3:30 am on Monday! I made Tom drink a couple of beers before we left, to thin his blood after the marathon. We packed the last few items and picked up our friends who live 2 blocks away, who drove us to the airport in our car. We had a lot to lug to the counter..car seat, stroller, 2 carry-ons and 3 full suitcases. Thank goodness Southwest has no baggage fees! Our first flight was at 6:05 am. The line to check in was way long and so was the security check. We literally walked up to our gate and boarded 2 minutes later. It was a full flight-actually, all of our flights were. It took about 3 hours to get to Phoenix. Trevor was great, we watched part of a movie, had some snacks, switched sitting on each lap. We landed about 30 minutes early and already had an hour layover before our next flight. Then, we found San Diego had some bad fog and we would be delayed another 30 minutes. Trevor was a trooper, running on very little sleep. All he wanted to do was pull around his backpack. It was so adorable and we got comments for it every 5 seconds.

We had some breakfast, Tom walked a lot, I peed a lot. The time went quickly and soon we were on our quick flight to SD. It was only about 50 minutes and as soon as we went up, we went down. :)

We finally arrived at 10:30 CA time. We had already been up 9 hours at that point! The weather was simply perfect and we fell in love instantly. We got our bags and took the shuttle to the rental car place. Unfortunately, we had to wait over an hour to check out! Everyone waiting there was very unhappy. It was the longest part of our day, for sure. We finally got our car and headed North to Anaheim! Trevor watched Letter Factory in the car. We were trying to keep him up so we could nap with him at the hotel. We flew to our destination and got there in just over an hour.

We grabbed some lunch and checked into our hotel. The room was a suite and we were totally spoiled. It had a kitchen area, sitting area and a nice bedroom. We layed Trevor down and took a family nap. It was glorious.

We got up, showered and wanted to get out for a few hours that night. We went to downtown Disney. Trevor was immediately going nuts over all of the characters pictures..I knew we made the right decision to go to Disney.

We ate, danced to the music, went in a few stores, and soaked in the surroundings.

Trevor was a dancing fool! He went on for nearly 30 minutes. He would pull one of us in to join him every once in a while.

We stopped at Target on the way back for juice boxes, milk and a few essentials. We went to bed and were so excited to go back to the park the next day!

We spent Tuesday at California Adventure. The weather was amazing, 82 degrees and sunny. We took the shuttle and got there right as it opened. There was a lot of construction going on, the Main Street and Carsland. We walked straight to the new Ariel ride.

Holding up a 1 for our first ride

Next was Toy Story. We knew the line would be long all day so we wanted to get it done early. We loved it!

We went on the ferris wheel and opted for the non-swinging gondolas. It was cool to see the whole park from the top. Carsland looks amazing and right out of the movie.

Trevor did great meeting the characters. I was expecting him to be pretty scared of them. He was hesitant at first and would want us to walk up with him. He cooperated for pictures and genuinely enjoyed them.

We went to the other side of the park to the Monsters Inc area. Its one of his favorite movies and he loved the ride.

We saw Muppets 3D and then went to the Beauty and the Beast show. Trevor fell asleep immediately, which worked out too well. We kept him sleeping afterward and Tom went on the water raft ride.

We went back to meet some characters before the Playhouse Disney show.

We went to turtle talk with Crush and stopped to have some dinner. We would snack all day and we also brought pb&j and our own drinks. It saved us so much money to only have to pay for one full meal a day.

Tom and I took turns riding Soarin, which Squishy loved. He was dancing to the music, it was adorable. We finished our night in the bugs land and went on the last 3 rides.

We were in the park from the minute it opened until the minute it closed. Trevor slept about 2 hours in total and blew us away with his mood. He had the best day and so did we!

We got back to the hotel and but Trevor in his crib. All of a sudden, we hear a little voice say, "Daddy? I sleep wif you guys?" HOW do you say no to that? We let him climb in with us and he slept like a rock. He was back in his nook like when he was a teeny infant. I woke up when my alarm went off and he still slept. Here he is around 8am. I was on the right of the bed moments before. I didn't mind him giving me little room..not one bit.

That day we went to Disneyland and I will post about that later!! I have our whole trip to catch up on. In addition, I have to talk about my 20 week ultrasound from Wednesday. Oh, and they accepted our offer on the house! We are waiting for the inspection and final contract..I'm not getting too excited yet..but it just may work out!

Marathon Announcement

2011-10-19T11:57:00.000-07:00

So, on Sunday the 9th, Tom ran the Chicago marathon for the 2nd year in a row! It was about 85 degrees and way to hot, AGAIN! I filled my car up with some great friends and we left the suburbs at 6:30am to drive downtown and support Tom. None of our friends knew the sex of the baby, so we had a shirt made to share the news. We waited at the 2 mile marker and after searching for what felt like forever, I heard Brian yell, ITS A BOY!!, as I was chasing Trevor. Tom ran by quick, everyone hugged and congratulated me and Trevor and I was relieved we could finally talk about him. :) Just then, a girl walked over and said, "I read your blog! I said earlier that it would be so funny if I saw Tom!" I said a quick hello and was back to chasing Trevor. Tom heard her yell, "I read your wifes blog!" from the crowd. Small world out there..

We walked toward the 13 mile marker and talked about baby boy. We stopped at my friends dads office and relaxed and wasted some time. We went to mile 13, after dodging through the runners(which is very difficult to do with a stroller) and saw Tom pretty quickly. He was all smiles but I could tell he was hurting. He joked about wishing he had done a half marathon..exactly what he said last year. He gave kisses and kept running!

We had quite the journey to get to mile 22. We met up with Toms mom and sisters, who saw him at mile 16 and were finally in the know about baby boy. We walked many blocks and took the el over to the southside. It was hot for the spectators and the running looks miserable. It was a great place to go and cheer because at that point, they really need it. We found Tom again, who had major leg cramps and wanted some fruit. We offered him some of Trevor's smoothie. We told him to finish strong and we would see him at the end.

We planned to meet at Buckingham fountain like last year, but they gated it off. It was chaos with too many people and we were all exhausted. Tom ended up asking to use someones cell phone and we met by the open fire hydrant. He finished at 5 hours, 42 minutes. He was annoyed with the heat and leg cramps. He had to walk a lot after mile 15. But, he finished and I am damn proud. He said he wants to run next year. His exact words were, "I want to RUN the marathon, not have the marathon RUN me." Haha

Trevor was such a rockstar the whole day. He took a quick nap in the stroller, snacked, sprayed the runners with a squirt bottle and had fun. I was thankful for my friends who came to help out. We calculated that we walked about 6 miles in total, I wad really dragging by the time I had to drive home.

We came home, Trevor took a real nap and Tom and I layed on the couch for quite a while. I finally had to get up and finish packing and cleaning and getting ready for the next morning. I set my alarm for 3:30 am..that was painful. But I got everything done and hit the bed, hard.

We're Back!

2011-10-17T18:23:00.000-07:00

We are home from vacation! And we are t.i.r.e.d! We returned yesterday about 1pm Chicago time, but with the time change and exhaustion from the week catching up to us, today was rough. The vacation was unforgettable..simply perfect. Trevor thrived from having two on one attention for over a week. Every minute revolved around him and he loved it!

I have lots of stories and pictures to share. First, I have to back up to when our vacation started. Before we left, we went up to the cottage overnight to go to a farm and enjoy the warm weather. We wanted to apple pick, but the line was long. We just participated in the free activities for the day. Trevor fell asleep on the way there and was still so sleepy for the first few minutes.

He just needed his Daddy to snuggle before he could play..

Enjoying some cold apple cider

Its was a fun little kick-off to our time together. That night, we went to the outlet mall in search for some matching clothes for the boys..which are much harder to find than I expected! Tom had to prepare for the marathon by eating a lot of carbs. We headed back home on Saturday and continued packing and getting ready for the marathon day and for California!

To be continued..

Bittersweet

2011-10-13T10:36:00.000-07:00

I have been feeling a little down lately. The day I have been dreading since February is fast approaching. I would love to skip over it completely. Go to bed on October 21st and wake up on the 23rd? October 22nd is the due date for my miscarriage.

To be honest, I hadn't thought about the loss much. Summer was a blur and I tried to focus on the good in my life. Now that we are in the dreaded month, I cant escape the pain.

Its such an odd feeling. I know that if I hadn't lost the baby(s) then, this little guy couldn't be baking inside me. That, ladies and gentlemen, is the definition of bittersweet.

I know it will be a busy day, the 22nd. I plan to carve out a little time to honor our angels and remember how lucky we are to be where we are today.

19 Weeks

2011-10-11T13:21:00.000-07:00

How far along? 19 Weeks!!
Total weight gain/loss: 3 pounds
Maternity clothes? All pants, except one pair
Sleep: One day good, one day bad..unpredictable
Best moment this week: Telling our news!
Movement: Every day
Food cravings: Soup, Chili
Gender: A boy!
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: Not a single thing
What I am looking forward to: This week away
Weekly Wisdom: You can love a second child as much as your first. ;)
Milestones: Gender reveal?

We had a crazy warm weekend here; it was in the low 80's! It was hot this week last year. I remember because of the marathon. Its nice to do the fall activities with T-shirts and shorts. It always cools off by Halloween. Then, there is this website.
http://www.enewspf.com/latest-news/latest-local/27534-great-worst-of-winter-2011-2012-aimed-for-chicago.html
I keep hearing how this will be the winter that makes Chicago residents want to move. Hopefully, the worst is over by the time little man arrives.

It's A...

2011-10-08T15:53:00.000-07:00

BOY! A{nother} baby boy!

As I said, we went to the ultrasound a few Fridays ago. We told the tech our story quickly and she assured us that she would check 3 times before telling us. We were in the ultrasound room all of 2 minutes before she said Its a boy! We fell in love with our second son during the quick ultrasound and went on with our day. As we were leaving, the tech said, "Just so you know, there is no doubt that baby is a boy." Haha

We are so thrilled. I am excited to give Trevor a built in best friend. I am excited to fulfill Toms dream of having two sons close together. I am excited to get another Mamas boy.

Tom is wearing a shirt for the marathon that says Its a boy in big blue letters. I have some friends coming down with me and Toms family will be there. We had to go tell my family quickly today, before they left for the cottage. Everyone was very happy.

I still cant believe I will have two sons. Amazing.

PS-You know how when you were little and you had your family mapped out in your head, children's names, ages, etc? I ALWAYS wanted 5 kids. And I always wanted a boy, a boy, twin girls and a final boy. Maybe Ill get what I always wanted? Time will tell..

Pumpkin Farm

2011-10-06T12:10:00.000-07:00

Here are the pics from our annual trip to the pumpkin farm. My oldest nephew had a friend over for the weekend and didnt come with. It made me very sad to be missing a piece, but we had our hands full with the other 5.5. :)

It was chilly and Rylan loved my sling. She would fall asleep instantly and there was no doubt she was warm enough! Brady told me her and the baby in my belly must have been having a conversation.

They added a few new rides this year, which were a big hit!

Our fave place, the petting zoo!

We had lunch and then saw the pig races. Laneys pig won, again. She wins every single time we go.

On to the hay ride..

The best pic I could get of all 5

Trevor was not feeling pics at this point, he was tired. I hope to get some with my new lens when we go apple picking tomorrow!

This was new too, a corn pit!

This pic makes me heart melt. Tom was put on this Earth to be a Daddy. My kids Daddy. <3

Dont Forget to Remember

2011-10-03T18:57:00.000-07:00

My little boy will turn 2 in just over a month. I will never forget the moment I held him in my arms the first time. He was wrapped up tight, and the moment our eyes met, we were madly in love. I love having a son and adore the way he acts toward me.

I never want to forget the way he is..right now. He wakes up with a smile and asks for his milk. He snuggles with me in bed, taking over Daddys side. He tells me he loves me, even when I dont ask. He gets frustrated and asks me to fix it. If I get hurt, he kisses my ouchies. He wants me to make more trains go by. He tells me to dance along in the car. His hand fits inside mine, just right.

Today, as we walked outside after his haircut, Trevor noticed the moon. He was so excited and I took a moment to realize that I hung the moon for Trevor. I hung his moon.

And yet, he has done so much more for me. :)

18 Weeks

2011-10-02T19:00:00.000-07:00

How far along? 18 Weeks!!
Total weight gain/loss: 2 pounds
Maternity clothes? Sometimes, pants are more comfortable
Sleep: I haven't been sleeping well and have odd, detailed dreams
Best moment this week: Visiting the pumpkin farm, knowing we will bring our lil punkin back next year
Movement: I feel it every day, mostly at night
Food cravings: Hot chocolate, ice cream
Gender: Cant tell just yet..
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: Not a single thing
What I am looking forward to: Vacation!!!
Weekly Wisdom: Cherish every moment while pregnant..it goes faster and faster
Milestones: Consistent movement..Daddy is anxious to feel it!

Hello, October!

2011-10-01T07:18:00.000-07:00

September has flown by and today marks the first day of a very fun month for us! Today, we head to the pumpkin farm with my nieces and nephews. Its a perfect way to start the fall season. Tomorrow we have a birthday party and baby shower. We work all week, have a bday dinner Thursday, head to the cottage to go apple picking, have the marathon next Sunday and leave at 6am on Monday the 10th. Its a good thing I packed as much as I could today. I wont have time to do it later!

We put an offer in on a house yesterday. We are anxious to get a response. We feel like our chances of it working out are slim to none, simply because that's our "luck" lately. If it falls through, we will probably look for a bigger rental. I don't want to move in the middle of winter or 9 months pregnant!

After we get back from vacation, we have 2 birthday parties, lots of Halloween parties and activities, Boo at the Zoo, Rylans baptism, etc. October is always hectic! Trevor has been taking music class on Monday mornings and swim class on Tuesday nights. They both end at the end of the month. I have been waiting to sign him up again until I find out Tom schedule. I am going to mourn if we lose our Fridays together..which is very likely.

My belly grew a lot this week. I took the time to pull out bigger bras, maternity jeans and some shirts. It will be a challenge to dress in what I already have because I was opposite seasons with Trevor.

I cant remember what I said last about finding out the sex of the baby. Pregnancy brain has been BAD. We were supposed to find out on Monday and keep it our secret until Sunday for the marathon. Tom is going to wear a shirt that says Its a boy or Its a girl to tell our family/friends. Well, that is still happening..but, we went to the ultrasound early. Last Friday, we decided one week wouldn't make a difference and we were ready to know what we are baking. The 3 of us went and found out! Evan is the only person who knows and no one knows we went to the ultrasound early. Its been fun to keep it between us for a while. I'm not sure if Ill spill the beans Monday night or wait until after the marathon next Sunday. We will see..

Below are pics of Trevor at the children's museum before we went to the ultrasound. I have been slacking with pics lately because my lens is beat up. I hope to get a new one in the next few days.

In My Head

2011-09-25T20:08:00.001-07:00

Im happy to report the pain has not come back and I have been feeling great!!

I feel the baby move every day now and I am loving every second. Tom is getting anxious to feel it too, a few more weeks!

I finally booked our hotels for CA, all that is left is buying our park tickets.

I went to a baby boy shower today; I will attend a baby girl (IVF baby!) shower next Sunday.

I love that Tom is so passionate about the Bears. I just wish they didnt let him down so much. ;)

Trevor is the most loving boy I have ever met. He constantly takes a time out from playing to come over and say, I love you, Mama.

There are 2 weeks until our vacation, we are counting down!

I cant believe October begins on Saturday! We are kicking off the month by taking all 6 kids to the pumpkin farm. Its our yearly tradition and I am so excited!

I have no clue what to dress Trevor as for Halloween. This may be the last year he lets me pick.

Ive been procrastinating planning his bday party. I wont do anything until I find out what Toms new shift is. I cant plan a party until I am sure Daddy can attend.

I am still wearing regular clothes. I still dont believe I am so small, especially the second time around.

I have been terrible at taking weekly pictures. I will take one tomorrow..I hope.

Trevors newest phrases are Be-tuz(because), what did you say?, my favorite, dont say that.

He got his flu shot a few days ago and didnt even cry.

I am super excited to give birth again. Nov 10-11th were the hardest hours of my life. Of course, they were the most rewarding.

I sit and fantasize about having this baby set on my chest and not whisked away. I didnt get that last time and darn it, I want it!

I adore my husband and am very lucky to call him mine.

ER Visit

2011-09-20T18:53:00.000-07:00

Monday morning, I woke up in some serious pain. I was dreaming and actually thought the pain was part of my dream, until I came around and realized it was very real. It was in my lower abdomen, right about where my precious baby is. I got up to pee and went to lay back down. I tried to asses the pain and I told Tom to wake up. It was only on my right side and so tender if you touched it. I kept waiting for it to go away and it just wouldn't. At one point, I freaked out that something could be wrong with Squishy and burst into tears. I told Tom to get the heartbeat doppler. We found baby's heartbeat right away, so that was a relief. The pain was getting worse and a constant throbbing even when I was completely still.

I called the OB to see if I needed to go to the ER or if I could wait until the OB opened in a few hours. I had the chills in bed and told her I had an upset stomach all weekend. Because of that, she said to go get checked out. We left for the hospital at about 5:40, dropped Trevor by my parents and went to the ER.

Of course, when I got there, the pain was much better. It was only tender if you pushed. We met with the doc, got an IV started, drew some blood and signed me up for an ultrasound. They wanted to put a foley catheter in but I promised I had enough pee for the ultrasound. The tech was so nice and I got to peek at the baby for a bit. She measured the head, femur, stomach and legs and it averaged to 16w6d and I was 16w3d. I have been a bit concerned about being so small and I'm glad to know the baby is measuring big! Baby looked perfectly healthy, so that was a relief. She checked my kidneys and ovaries. She couldn't find my right ovary, so they weren't sure what that was about. I was sent back to talk to the doc.

Doc came in and said everything looked fine. They didn't want to do any other tests that could harm the baby. He said it could be an appendicitis, gall bladder issue, kidney stone, etc? Now I wait to see if it comes back. So far, we are in the clear!

I had a regular OB appointment already scheduled for Monday evening. I kept it and filled her in on my day. She also said just to monitor the pain and call if I have a fever or vomit or anything out of the ordinary.

I really hope that was our last hospital visit before baby comes in 2012!

Baby Names

2011-09-14T15:15:00.000-07:00

I cant believe I am typing another baby name post. I remember when I did this with Trevor and I am so thankful to be stressing about choosing another perfect name for a perfect angel. I'm not sure if we will keep the name a secret once decided. We really loved doing that with T and I think we will try.

Our girl name options..

Hadley-the name we had for Trevor before we found out he was a boy! Still Daddy's favorite. It has grown in popularity lately due to a character in a book.
Reese-my current favorite. We talked about naming her Therese, so she can have a more formal name when she is older. I think we like just plain Reese, thought.
I like Irish names like Bridget and Maeve, but Tom isn't a fan.
Harper-I think it sounds super cute with Trevor, but it has become so popular too.

The middle name would likely be Elizabeth. I also like Ireland for a middle name. I would love to surprise my sister and use her name, Jeralyn, as a middle. But its tough to find something that sounds good with it!

Our boy name options..

Gavin
Sawyer
Cael
Benett-Don't like the nickname Ben, so it may not happen.
Sutton
Lincoln-Would call him Cole.
Camden
Madden-We keep bringing this one up, but its so different.
Connell
Bryce

The middle name would probably be Thomas.

Lets see.. my rules when it comes to naming. Tom thinks I am crazy..

1-If we do another T name, all of our kids will have T names. Then we will be like the Duggars and have Tom, Erin and a bunch of T's.
2-I prefer names with 2 syllables, like Trevor. Its a bonus if it has 6 letters.
3-It has to be nickname friendly. We are huge nickname people.
4-The name has to be appropriate for a person at all stages of life..a baby, child, teenager and adult!
5-It can not end in -son, due to our last name. Or just -on, for that matter.

Opinions, please? I wont be offended. We are not in love with anything yet, (except Tom and Hadley), so I wont take it personally. :)

15 Weeks

2011-09-13T20:06:00.000-07:00

How far along? 15 Weeks!!
Total weight gain/loss: Still no gain, just like with Trevor
Maternity clothes? Nope
Sleep: I finally have some energy back! I have been sleeping better at night, but often have very odd and detailed dreams.
Best moment this week: I lay in the bed in the morning and rub my belly..I just love that feeling
Movement: Pretty positive I felt the baby on Friday. Although, I haven't noticed it since
Food cravings: Cold drinks, chocolate
Gender: Still thinking boy
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: Having no headaches! They are back in full force. Today, I had one so bad that I was in bed, in pain from 6-9 pm. What a waste of a night!
What I am looking forward to: Our family vacation and shopping for the baby while there!
Weekly Wisdom: I feel small for almost 16 weeks and was getting concerned. I went back and compared the lack of weight gain and small bump to Trevor's pregnancy and its exactly the same.
Milestones: Movement will be regular soon, almost 4 whole months pregnant!

20 days until we find out the gender! Tom and I spent Friday night browsing boy names and all the ones we like are pretty uncommon. I don't really want to be too trendy. We aren't in love with any of the names, so we will keep our minds open. Ill do a baby name post this week! I put a poll up tonight, what are we having!?

Tom and I took Trevor out for a fun day at a local amusement park. It closed down a while back and reopened this year as an Azoosement park..animals and rides! The weather was great and we had a blast. We always make the best of our time as a family of 3. I look forward to next summer when there are 4 Robertson's. :)

I was very hesitant about putting him on this ride. Much to our surprise, he loved it! You couldn't even see his little head when it was up high. It came back down and he was laughing and hitting the sides. It helped that he rode with another little boy. They had tons of fun!

This weekend calls for another day of family fun, deciding on a birthday party plan and finalizing our trip. Thanks for all of the emails, they have been so helpful!

Still Here

2011-09-09T08:48:00.000-07:00

I'm still here, still alive and still pregnant. :) 15 weeks tomorrow, I cant believe how fast its going. With Trevor, my pregnancy consumed us. Its all we thought about, talked about, dreamed about. I often joke this baby is getting the shaft because were busy and I almost forget I am carrying another life inside me. Then I pull out my wonderful heartbeat doppler and grin from ear to ear, comparing how much stronger s/he got overnight.

We've been busy with..life. A certain little girl asked me and Tom to be her godparents.

I was super surprised and happy to walk into this at their house. They wanted to ask us together, but Tom was at work. So, they texted him a picture of her that said, "Get your suit and tie ready, Godfather!" I am honored to be her godmother, but even more excited that Tom gets to be her godfather. He really wanted it. And we get to do it together..how special. Her baptism is October 23.

We spent a nice Labor Day weekend at the cottage. Friday it was hot and perfect for the beach. Saturday, it dropped 20+ degrees and we stayed that cool the rest of the weekend.

See those pink toes sticking out? Rylan had her first pedi from Auntie Erin.

Ive been trying to plan and book our trip to San Diego next month. Ive gotten great help from other bloggers!! We decided to extend the trip by a day and a half and squeeze in a trip to Disneyland. It seemed silly for us to fly across the country for only 4 full days of fun. The first day or two we will hang with Mickey and the rest of the week we will go to the zoo, SeaWorld, etc. in San Diego. We cant wait! I already started setting aside clothes and things we need to bring. I booked the rental car and now I need to decide on what tix we will get for everything else. Oh, and a hotel would be nice. Ive been watching prices and waiting for a sale. If anyone has any Disneyland/San Diego area tips they want to share, please email me at TERobertson18aol.com.

Trevor started his swim class this week. We always sign him up for fall/winter to keep him loving the water. I also signed him up for a music class on Monday mornings. We start this Monday and I know he is going to love it!

I mentioned before that we find out the sex on October 3rd and wanted to share after the marathon on the 9th. We decided that Tom will actually wear a shirt that says Its a...for the marathon. Hopefully, this will get some of our family and friends out to support him.

I was really thinking the baby was a girl and now I am sure its a boy. Other than the nausea in the beginning, its been very similar to Trevor's pregnancy. I haven't gained any weight. I don't have a big bump. I get headaches. Only a few weeks until we know!

I am welcoming fall with open arms. I cant wait to take Trevor to the pumpkin farm, apple picking, boo at the zoo, etc. I want to eat soup and drink apple cider and paint my belly like a pumpkin.

Toms shift will change sometime in October and I'm really dreading it. I don't want to go back to working single Mama many days of the week. It was tough last time and this time I will be pregnant too.

No news on the house hunting. We tried to put an offer on a house and it temporarily went off the market for a repair. Its been almost 3 weeks and its still off. If we don't find something by November, we agreed to look for a bigger rental. I do not want to move in the middle of winter and we need more space before baby.

That about sums it up. Happy Friday, everyone!

A Letter To Me

2011-08-30T18:26:00.000-07:00

Dear Erin, August 2010
Right now, you are trying to decide when to wean Trevor from breastfeeding, so you can try to get pregnant with your second baby. You hoped it would happen on its own, but considering your infertility past as well as full time nursing, you know it wasn't likely. You'll find out that you have to switch clinic and will jump through a few hurdles before you can move forward. This will work in your favor, as it gives you more time nursing Trevor. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, November 2010
Every test came back normal and you are ready to move forward. Trevor took one IVF cycle and you have nearly perfect embryos from the same cycle. This has to work! Starting your cycle on Trevor's birthday gives you major hope that this is it. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, Christmas 2010
I'm sorry that it didn't work. You've never known this feeling before. And it sucks. Pick up the pieces and move forward. You can and will succeed. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, February 2011
This will be the hardest month of your entire life. You will feel the greatest joy as you surprise your family with your news of being pregnant. Sadly, your world will come crashing down and you will miscarry. You will sit in limbo for weeks, trying to understand what is going on inside your body. Your four embryos you started with are gone. Every glimmer of hope will be gone. You cling to Tom and Trevor and somehow embark on a full IVF cycle. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, April 2011
You are optimistic about this IVF cycle. You have good odds. You will retrieve more eggs that with Trevor, have more embryos and get a phenomenal report from Dr. M, stating it was one of the best cycles of his career. You're shocked and excited. Until the tests don't come up positive. The day before your beta, you will see the P word and feel relief. It lasts hours, and is diagnosed a chemical pregnancy. You are left wondering, how could this be? You look into Trevor's eyes and know you have to trek on..and you will. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, June 2011
This is a good month. You secretly do another FET and feel pregnant instantly. On June 23rd, you see positive tests and know this is the baby you will hold in your arms. You fear the worst, due to the past few months, but there is no need. It will be okay, I promise.

Dear Erin, August 2011
I told you it was going to be okay.

I wish I knew how long and difficult our ride to this baby was going to be. After Trevor, I was sure it would be easier. After all, how could it be harder? I was proven wrong and am still in disbelief of what our family went through in less than a year.

I often think about the first time I will hold this baby and it takes everything in me to stop myself from sobbing. Its still not real. Every time I hold the doppler to my abdomen, I am a little surprised to hear the thump, thump, thump. I stare at my changing body and cant quite picture the person whos causing it.

I am excited to have another birth story, to pick a name, to breastfeed the babe. But when I hold our second little miracle..stare at someone who saved me from heartache, snuggle this baby on my chest..on the outside instead of only in my heart..I know I wont be able to hold back.

And yes, if I could somehow get an email sharing what hurdles we will have to jump to get to baby #3, ahead of time, that would be great. :)

Trevor Update

2011-08-30T11:16:00.000-07:00

My little monkey spent a special day downtown with Mama and Daddy on Friday. We took the train down, rode the water taxi to Michigan Ave, walked to Navy Pier, played at the Childrens museum, walked back to the water taxi, and took the train back. It was a long but fun day!

I cant believe he will be 22 months soon. So close to 2..He continues to surprise me every day with his understanding and amazing personality.

He picks up the lyrics to songs in an instant and sings along. We have the Carole Peterson and Laurie Berkner CDs in the car and he requests his favorite songs.

He is talking in 5-6 word sentences now. He usually adds the name of who he is talking to, in there. Like, "I hungry, Mama." The funniest thing is when he gives Tom his report of the day when he sees him. He just talks and talks and I have to interpret for Tom.

Poor guy got his first bee sting yesterday. :( I have never been stung, yet my 1 year old has! He was a trooper! He just whimpered and grabbed the back of his arm. Sure enough, there was a red dot, a white circle around it and it was very irritated. I watched him closely and am thankful he did not have an allergic reaction.

Trevor is still napping 2-3 hours in the afternoon. Hes pretty flexible about when he goes down. Unless he is tired and we are in the car, then he passes out. That can be tricky because he is not good at being transferred to his crib and staying asleep. We try to avoid that!

He is my fruit loving boy! He will eat almost any fruit and some favorites are blueberries, bananas, pears, peaches, grapes, etc. He will barely touch a vegetable. He ate corn recently and I was so happy!

We have been to parks often lately and he has mastered climbing ladders. He is scared of the swings. You can push him slow but if you go fast, he tenses up and makes this funny face.

He is always willing to give hugs and kisses..even licks. Haha When you ask for a hug, he comes close and turns around for you to wrap your arms around him.

He is obsessed with monsters right now! He has a few books that are his first pick at bedtime. He will pretend he is scared and its so funny.

He adores baby Rylan and all babies in general. He is super sweet and wants to kiss her and hold her. I hope that love of babies continues into the winter..

Trevor has always loved bath time and now will submerge his face for 5+ seconds. I will jokingly yell to Tom that Trevor is "trying to drown himself again."

He will tell you that he needs his nah-nee(pacifier) if he is upset or tired. I only give it to him at bedtime or if he is miserable. Im not sure when we will take it away. Im thinking around 2.

He is a tall and skinny boy. He swims in most 2T shirts and wears 18 month shorts/pants. His feet are huge-he is in size 8!

He does these hilarious "side-eyes", that we call them, and below is the perfect shot of it!

Tom and I talk about how lucky he is to be our first child. He is always in the spotlight loves it. I know it will take some adjusting when the new baby comes, but I think he will like having a playmate for life. :)

13 Weeks

2011-08-27T18:56:00.000-07:00

How far along? 13 Weeks!!
Total weight gain/loss: Even
Maternity clothes? Not yet
Sleep: Still tired all the time..and usually not sleeping well at night
Best moment this week: great report at the OB appointment
Movement: I felt Trevor starting at 15 weeks..I am so anxious to feel this baby!
Food cravings: Cold drinks, chocolate
Gender: Today, I say boy
Labor Signs: Nope
Belly Button in or out? In
What I miss: Nothing!
What I am looking forward to: Movement, gender reveal
Weekly Wisdom: A heartbeat monitor can make a bad day much better :)
Milestones: Out of 1st trimester!!!

I went to the OB on Friday and the appointment went great! I met the 2nd of 4 doctors and he was very nice. He reviewed my chart, asked a few questions and asked if I had any. I have been dizzy throughout the day and he said its due to the extra progesterone while pregnant. He said my uterus was measuring on track and babys heartbeat was 146 bpm. I think I have a UTI, so I gave my urine and they will let me know on Monday. I made my next OB appointment for the end of September and went ahead and scheduled our 20 week ultrasound too. Its set for October 18!

I want to know the sex of the baby before we go to California on the 10th. That way, I can shop! Tom and I will go do a gender scan at a local boutique on October 3rd and keep it to ourselves for a few days. October 9th, Tom is running the marathon. Afterward, we will gather our family and friends for dinner and reveal it then. Im not sure how exactly..perhaps a pink or blue cake..or two balloons and pop the one that is wrong? Any suggestions are welcome!

I was feeling confident the baby is a girl until the past few days. I have been brainstorming names and boys names are tough! I adore Trevor Michael and dont know how we will find one that is as perfect. I keep joking that the baby will be Trevor #2. Or Trevorina if its a girl. ;)

NT Scan and Dells

2011-08-24T17:39:00.000-07:00

Last Friday, we had our NT scan. I took Trevor to the children's museum with his cousins all morning and my Mom kept him for the appointment, since children aren't allowed. Tom got off an hour early and arrived just in time. They took me back to prick my finger and sat us back in the waiting room, warning it may be a while. A nurse called my name 2 minutes later. She didn't want us to have to wait forever, so she put me on a chair you typically sit in for a NST and we did the ultrasound there. The only negative was I wasn't able to see the screen until the very end. Lucky Tom was able to soak in the cuteness of baby. S/he was wiggling around. She took a ton of pictures and pointed everything out to us. The baby measured 12w2d, so a bit ahead. I mentioned I couldn't wait to find out what it was and she looked and said she couldn't quite tell. To mean, that means there was no penis sighted. You could tell the tech really loved her job, so I loved her. :) She said everything looked great and they would review the blood work and call in a week with results. They called today and said I have a 1 in more than 10,000 chance for everything. So glad to hear it! Here is our squishy baby:

After the scan, we headed to Wisconsin Dells!! The drive wasn't bad and we arrived around bedtime. We got up early on Friday and soaked in the beautiful day. We went to Noahs Ark and had so much fun. I loved going there as a kid and was a little bummed I couldn't enjoy the fun slides. I didn't want to take any risks! Trevor had a blast. He is my water baby. There were slides, water shooters, swings(you can barely push him or he gets scared), the wave pool, bumper boats, lazy river, etc. He had a blast in the wavepool and loved when the waves hit him. It was good training for the beach in San Diego!

Tongue out when concentrating, just like his Daddy.

Yee-haw!

Sharing goldfish..

Baby #2-12 weeks

We went back to the hotel so Trevor could nap and relaxed for a few hours. We took a quick trip to the outlet mall and got Tom his marathon shoes and Trevor the cutest Nike's for fall. We also bought a sweater for his 2 yr. old pictures. We went to dinner at Applebees and then went to the strip. Trevor thought it was hilarious to run in and out of each store. It was a gorgeous night.

The next morning, we played a bit(see below), packed up and went to breakfast at Paul Bunyans.

Tom gave me such a hard time about waiting in line for the buffet, but I can not go to Wis Dells without eating there! Trevor loved the donuts!

After breakfast, we went on the Ducks. Its a vehicle that goes in and out of water. It was an hour long tour and Trevor enjoyed it very much!

It was a quick trip, but lots of fun! Trevor is just the easiest toddler around and goes with the flow. We drove to the cottage and played at the beach all afternoon. That evening, Tom headed home alone and my family drove up to the Milwaukee Irish fest.

This week has gone by fast and were ready for a low-key weekend at home. I have an OB appointment on Friday and will report back after that!

Sentences

2011-08-17T18:55:00.000-07:00

HUGE NEWS! Trevor used the potty tonight! We have been sitting him on the turtle seat for months and nothing has ever happened. Tonight, he came up and said poop, Mama. I sat him down and sure enough, he pooped and peed! We rewarded him with a frosted animal cracker(as we were out of M&M's) and put underwear on him for a while afterward. I hope its a step in the right direction. Id really like to only have one child in diapers come February. :)

I think I have decided on what to do for Trevors birthday. I need to make a guest list, call around for pricing and then I will be set.

Tomorrow is my NT scan and I have this fear that nothing will be there. Like the baby just disappeared. Its been 3 weeks since Ive seen the baby and thats far too long. Im hoping we get to hear the heartbeat too, since we havent yet!

After the scan, we are heading to Wisconsin Dells for a little getaway. On the way back on Saturday, Tom is dropping us off at the cottage and Trevor and I will stay until Monday. He is going to love the waterpark, I cant wait!

I have a little bump going on. I have to start taking pictures this weekend so I can watch it grow.

Toms sergeant told him today that she wrote him a letter of recommendation for him being such a great employee. He had no idea she was doing this and I am proud of my hubby for always giving it 110%!

Tom and I needed a show to get into this summer and we are now totally addicted to Lost! We are halfway through season 2 and watch an episode or two every night.

I can believe how quickly fall is approaching us. I have no clue what to dress Trevor as for Halloween. He is going to love the holiday this year!

I have two baby showers coming up early fall. Makes me even more thankful to be pregnant.

All of these pics are from our evening trip downtown Monday. We met Sam and Brian at American Girl and treated Delaney for being the best flowergirl ever. We got big sundaes at Hersheys and had a great night.

Mass Update

2011-08-15T06:59:00.000-07:00

This blog has taken a back seat to life lately. Its about time I get it up to speed!

My Job
I mentioned before that I was going to be switching jobs. I had been very unhappy with my job the past 6ish months and had been keeping my ear open for something else to come along. My situation is tricky because I need to bring Trevor with me. I had a particularly rough week a while back and was ready to give my notice when they approached me and let me know the Mom will not be returning to work this fall. Talk about meant to be! I finished out my last 2 weeks with them and was very sad to say goodbye to the kids. I will miss them. Trevor will miss them. But this is whats best for us, no doubt about it. Itll be odd to change my schedule. I had the same one for 4.5 years! But, I welcome the change!

This week, I have lots of fun planned. Thursday night we head to the Dells for a few days and next Monday I start watching new kids.

Toms Job
Tom is pretty burnt out from work lately. They have him on a detail where he is moving 99% of the day. He is simply exhausted when he comes home. He is hoping to move to a different part of the department soon! His probation is over as of August 30th and he can test for other specialties then. His shift will change sometime in October. He is still working 7-3 with Fri & Sat off and it has made our summer great. He had to go in super early every day this week to request his vacation days off in October when we go to CA. You have to request exactly 60 days ahead of time and they only allow 5 people per day. So, he had to be the first one there to have a chance. He made it and can now look forward to 9 days off in mid-October!

Trevor Michael
This kid makes my world go round. I mean, really. He amazes me every day. His speech is exceptional. He talks in full sentences. He can say extremely difficult words. His memory is incredible. He had taken a new liking to all things monsters! His fave movies are Cars, Toy Story, Monsters Inc, Happy Feet, etc. He loves music and sings along to the kids CDs I keep in the car. He is learning his ABCs and colors right now. He can point out about 5 colors. He says the first and last part of the alphabet, forgets the middle! He likes dinosaurs, trains, cars, animals, and balls! Im brainstorming 2nd birthday ideas..Its hard to believe he has been hear almost 2 years!

Squishy Baby
I am just over 11 weeks pregnant! I have been a total slacker in taking belly pictures. I go for my NT scan this Thursday. I have been really tired since coming home from our trip. This upcoming week will be a nice break from the madness. We have been discussing names and have zero options for a boy. For that reason, I'm hoping for a girl. My boobs are still so sore but the nausea has gone away. I haven't gained any weight, but I am starving most of the day. I'm supposed to stop the endometrin and baby aspirin this weekend. I have a bit of a bump starting. I wore a jean skirt to the Taylor Swift concert Wednesday and it was uncomfortably tight. Trevor tells you there is a baby in Mamas belly and rubs Squishy.

Housing
We went back and forth about renting another year vs. buying and have been looking with our realtor for about a month. There are a few okay options, but were not in love yet. I am getting sick of our tiny condo and hoping to move before the winter hits us hard. Illinois is just so expensive, we need to move South.

I think that is suffecient for now. Happy Monday, all!