Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Yesterday

Thoughts that went through my head yesterday..

Finally! Twins!
I hope theyre both okay.
4 Kids under 4!
3 kids under 18 months!
3 kids in diapers!
3 cribs!
I will be huge.
I will be biggest in the summer.
We need a different car.
How will we arrange rooms?
I hope I can breastfeed them.
I cant wait to shop for matching outfits!
I dont want a c-section.
Tom needs this job more than ever before.
I love them so much.
Would they arrive in August or September?
Please let them be okay.
I cant wait to hear two heartbeats.
Would we be done having kids?
Imagine walking into the RE with 4 kids at home and asking for more!
We can find out the sexes in April.
This is a dream come true.

Also? Thank you all SO much for your support. I cant get over the amount of texts, personal emails, comments, etc..expressing your happiness for us. I love the stories shared, hearing about how you feel like you know me, the advice given, its all so wonderful. I appreciate each and every one of you for cheering on our family. I wish I could hug you, but a simple thank you will have to do.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Introducing...

Our Twins! 

Baby B's sac is smaller, so I am remaining guarded until I go in next week and can see two heartbeats. The tech said she is very good at "calling" a good pregnancy and she labeled them A and B and said they look great. Baby A measured 5w1d and Baby B 4w6d, so just a small difference. Both had yolk sacs, which is the first indicator of a healthy pregnancy. I am hoping they both grow accordingly and have little beating hearts at my appointment next Monday. 

She also spotted some fluid, which could explain the bleeding. They said its normal in twin pregnancies and as long as it doesnt soak a pad, its okay.

Twins, twins, twins..OH MY GOODNESS!!

Sunday, January 27, 2013

It Stopped!

I am happy to report that the bleeding stopped!! It went on for about 2.5 hours, minimal blood when I used the bathroom. Around 8pm, there was nothing and it has stayed away since!

As if I wasn't already anxious for my appointment tomorrow..I am so ready to see what is going on in there.

Appointment is 10:45 am. Thankfully, our mornings fly by and Tom took tonight off to accompany me.

I am hoping for a sac or two, in the right spot and possibly an answer for the spotting.

Ill report back as soon as were home.

Thank you for all of the prayers and for sharing your stories!!!


Saturday, January 26, 2013

Spotting

I went to the bathroom about an hour ago and saw red. Nothing on the pad, only when I wiped.

I am so upset. I plan to monitor it the next few hours and may go to the ER in a bit and see what's going on. I have only spotted once in my pregnancies and that was 2 days after Gavin's transfer and was almost nothing.

Please, please let it be okay. I'll update any changes. Thanks in advance for any prayers.




Friday, January 25, 2013

Oh, The Possibilities

It's Friday!! Only 3 more sleeps until our ultrasound. I'm currently wishing I made the appointment for 4 am, rather than 10:45. :) I'm still feeling pretty good. I feel nauseous here and there and I don't have much of an appetite. I've had a few days where the exhaustion has been extreme. I'm back to thinking there's just one, strong baby. I just can't wait to know for sure!!

In other life news, we got an email this week about Toms job. An email we have been waiting for since December 29th. He passed the most recent step in the hiring process and has his final physical next Friday, Feb 1st. Once he passes that..they just need to officially hire him.

This would mean a lot of change for our family. Living separate for a while, a big move, a temporary pay cut, just to name a few. I promise to give more details once he officially has it. Luckily, everything would be sorted out before new baby arrives.

I was so sure it would be one or the other. A baby or Daddys dream job. To think we may be getting both..

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

One or Two?

5 days until my ultrasound and I am DYING to know what is inside me!!


Honestly? I think its twins. With such an early positive and nice, high betas, I know its a great possibility. However, I am trying not to get my hopes up. We have always hoped for twins in the past and never gotten them. When you start with 2 babies, of course, you want to see two sacs on the screen!

As long as there is a baby..in the right place..with a heartbeat..we will be over the moon!
Two would just be..icing on the cupcake. ;)


Monday, January 21, 2013

Second Beta

593!!!

PHEW! I can breathe again.

Ultrasound is next Monday at 10:45 am. 

My heart is so happy right now!

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Too Good?

I really wish it was Monday at 3pm. Really, really. I am beyond anxious for my blood results that havent even been drawn yet. My appointment is at 9:30 tomorrow. They usually call before 3pm. I need that number. I need it to be over 500. I need to jump this hurdle that I havent always jumped in the past.


I feel like this pregnancy is too good to be true. It was SO easy. Order meds, a few appointments, a smooth transfer, positive tests 4 days later and a nice, high beta. Im waiting for the ground to fall out from under us. Its a terrible thought, but tonight, I cant shake it.

I jokingly told Tom that I love how "cheap" this baby was. $56 for medications and $100 fee for the transfer.    Its almost like he took me out to a nice dinner, got me drunk and knocked me up. Almost..

Please let me have a fabulous beta tomorrow!! 

Friday, January 18, 2013

Birth and beta day!

Happy Birthday to me,
Happy Birthday to me,
Beta came back at 173,
I'm really having baby three!!

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Beta Tomorrow!

Hello, darkest lines I've ever seen. I love you.




Wednesday, January 16, 2013

6dp5dt

Today is 6 days post transfer and the day I usually test. Thankfully, my lines are getting darker. It still doesn't feel real. Beta is in 48 hours. My beta with Gavin was 140, so I am hoping for something similar. This baby in my belly sure makes turning 26 a little less painful. ;)

Thank you for all of your congrats. It means so much!!



Monday, January 14, 2013

4dp5dt

After searching the internet this weekend, first to find hope of women being sick after a transfer and still becoming pregnant..then for women testing early and getting a positive...I felt the urge to test this morning.

Less than 4 days post transfer, since my transfer was at about 2:15pm.

This is what I saw:


Oh.My.Gosh!

I actually peed on a first response first. I could have sworn I saw the faintest line in all the land. I was driving myself crazy and couldnt go back to bed..so I drank a juice box and waited an hour. I figured Id torture myself and see Not Pregnant. I am so glad I was wrong. I have never gotten a positive this early before. Never before 6 days post!

It doesnt seem real. I am pregnant, again. Gavin and the baby will be 18 months apart. We are one step closer to completing our family..this is everything I ever wanted and MORE!

Please, nothing on FB or Instagram!! Its going to be hard to keep a secret, but Im going to try my hardest. 

Saturday, January 12, 2013

2dp5dt

The 2 days since my transfer have been quite eventful. Yesterday, we had a normal day around the house and Tom took me on my birthday date a week early. I have been dying to go to RPM in the city since it opened. Tom made reservations weeks ago and I was so excited! We left the boys with our friends and had a fabulous night. The restaurant was cool and the food was phenomenal. We got done early and picked up the boys. Gavin had been fine since Wednesday night and all of a sudden he threw up all over the car. I hopped in the back seat as fast as I could. We felt so bad for him. We pretty much put the boys to bed and crashed ourselves.

2am rolls around and I woke up sick. I was instantly terrified for the babies. I threw up a few times and had a pounding headache. Tom felt sick too but never vomited. The entire day was spent in shifts, caring for the boys and napping. I finally felt better late afternoon when my headache was gone. Trevor ended up throwing up his dinner. I'm really hoping we all feel better tomorrow!!

I'm really hoping the cupcakes are fighters and can hold on tight in a less than ideal environment. I could really use a uterus cam right now...

Thursday, January 10, 2013

PUPO!!!

Today could have been a disaster, but it turned out just perfect. Gavin slept well and woke up feeling okay. There is something still off about him..he has a low fever and was tired all day..but no more vomit. He ate and drank normally. I was very thankful to not have to worry about my baby when I had to worry about my other babies.


The morning flew by and we headed downtown around lunchtime. We made awesome time and had plenty of time to go to Sprinkles. It was literally directly across from the parking garage. We got black and white, red velvet, banana and smores. :)




We got to the surgery center about 10 minutes early and I peed and then started to drink my bottle of water. One transfer, I didnt have a very full bladder and it took a while for Dr. M to get the cathedar in. I didnt want that to happen this time. Its one of the few things I have control over. 

They were running about 20 minutes behind. My bladder was feeling fuller by the minute and the nerves really kicked in. They finally called my name and I got suited up, signed papers and Dr. M came right in. Our first 2 embryos thawed beautifully and we still have 4 on ice. So, so thrilled about that! 

I told them my bladder was about to explode and they took us right back. The transfer was the fastest and easiest yet. They had a newer screen where I could watch everything, so that was nice. There is something very special about knowing the exact moment life enters your body. I squeezed Toms hand tight...partially bc I was in horrible pain. ;)

They wheeled me back and I had to lay flat for 30 minutes. About 5 minutes in I gave up and asked for a bedpan. Not my finest moment, but I felt so much better.



We got in the car and I made my pregnancy beta test for next Friday, my birthday, at 10am. I realized that Id be pregnant on my birthday for 2 years in a row. I like that. :) Ill probably test the day before I go in. We will see!! 

I spent the rest of the night hanging around, playing with the boys and relaxing. I am wiped out from the stress of the day and am looking forward to sleeping tonight. 

I really hope these two cupcakes decide to snuggle in and hang around. We promise to make it worth their while. 

Thanks for all of the comments, emails and texts. And thank you iPhone, for documenting our day. 

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Tomorrow!!!

Well, here we are. Night before transfer.


I had this big plan of stopping at Sprinkles cupcakes(which is super close to the surgery center) beforehand and grabbing some for a treat after dinner. Then, we can go put our cupcakes in my oven and hold hands and skip merrily to the car. Kidding about the skipping, of course.

That may or may not happen. Cupcakes will be placed in the oven, but I may have to go alone. Gavin got sick tonight. He has vomited 3 times in the past 2 hours. Its breaking my heart. One time, it was so much and came out of his nose and scared the heck out of him. The last time, I was holding his head over the toilet and trying to get it all out. Such a pathetic sight! Hes asleep now and when its time for me to climb in bed, I plan on pulling him in with us. I am too scared he will vomit again and choke on it. 

I am hoping this is a quick thing and not the terrible flu that is taking over Chicago. I am hoping I dont get it. If Gavin is well enough, Tom will come down with me and the day will go as planned. If not, I will go myself and just come home pregnant. Totally normal, no?

Thanks in advance for any well wishes/prayers/sticky baby thoughts sent our way tomorrow around 2pm. Its always so nerve wracking as we wait to hear how the embryos thawed.

Oh, if you follow me on instagram..remember this is a secret. If I refer to the cupcakes..youll know what I am talking about. Just try to be subtle. ;)  I'm trevmama11. 

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

2 More Sleeps

Thursday at 2pm can not come fast enough! We are excited, scared, anxious and just ready to get our babies back where they belong!! I told Trevor we could spend the whole day in jammies, watching movies and cuddling. My Mom will come over for us to go to the transfer and then we will pick up where we left off the rest of the night. I cant wait.


I'm feeling more scared than anything lately. I've found myself searching for successful FET stories..reminding myself it CAN happen on the first try. It didn't with Gavin, but I cant dwell on that. Everything is set up for success, so we can hope and pray for sticky babies.

Two more sleeps until transfer day! 

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Transfer is SET!

My appointment today couldnt have gone better!

My lining was 11!! And triple stripe! The fluid was gone and everything looked perfect. My blood levels came back normal and my transfer is set for Thursday at 2pm.

I change up my meds tomorrow..lower the amount of estrace, drop the lupron and start the endometrin suppositories.

I am so, very happy. This amazing appointment reassured me that this is going to work. If we had done IVF, our retrieval would have been today. So, today, our babies are "made".

Also? I slept in until 9am and it finally snowed. Its a beautiful Saturday.

Friday, January 4, 2013

Christmas Catch-Up

Christmas has come and gone and we had the best time. Im not going to lie, December 26th, Tom and I packed up all of the decorations, untrimmed the tree and were ready to move on. We did a lot of celebrating and were ready to close that door and move on to 2013.

We did so many fun things and I only have a few pictures to prove it. Ive found it to be hard to keep the nice camera handy with two mobile children. I am much better about quick posts and updates on instagram, thanks to my lovely iPhone. I never mesh the two together, but may need to start printing those pics and loading them here..

What did we do? 
Brookfield Zoo lights
Lincoln Park Zoo lights
Navy Pier childrens museum
Movie night at park district-Muppets Christmas carol
Gingerbread houses/Grinch night with friends
Visited the train display at the Morton Arboretum
...I think thats all...









Christmas Eve was a pretty normal day for us. Tom slept all day and the boys and I just hung out. He had to go to work from about 2-6 pm so we met him over at his Dads house for a get together. We exchanged gifts and had dinner and it was really nice. We went home, read Twas the night before Christmas and Santa came.





Tom got home around 8am and we managed to do presents in about 30 minutes. Trevor was really excited, while Gavin enjoyed his new teether toy. :) Trevor got a lot of different gifts..books, movies, Jake and the pirates toys, magnatiles, a Leappad2, etc. Gavin got a lot of board books, big boy toys..ball popper, activity garden, music table, etc. Tom slept the rest of the day..as usual. It turned out okay. Gavin took a big morning nap, so Trevor and I built toys and watched the Disney parade. Then, Trevor took a big nap and Gavin and I played and I soaked in his 1st Christmas.







After Tom got up, we headed to my parents. The best word to describe it is chaos. Beautiful chaos. :) Its gifts for 18 people, 7 spoiled children, a yummy dinner by my brothers fiance and lots of love.



My favorite gifts this year were Country Thunder tix provided by my parents and swimming lessons for the boys provided by Toms dad. Anything that gifts us special time with our family/kids is the best. 

New Years Eve/day was low key, as well. Tom was at work at midnight, so no kissing here. We vowed to make up for it next year. We are 4 days into 2013 and my hopes are sky high. 

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Hurry Up and Wait

I have a million and four thoughts running through my head. SO much catching up to do. I am tired, stressed and exhausted. Good luck to all reading this post. :)

1) Christmas was amazing. Hands down, best Christmas we have had. Time with Tommy was limited, as his job doesn't have holiday time. But, we loved sharing the joy with both kids and did so many fun activities and celebrations.

2) Today is FET day 33. I went to the doctor on Monday and my lining was 7.5, which is right on track. I had a little fluid, which has never happened before. Im a little worried, but they didnt seem concerned. I return on Saturday and if all is well, they will set me up for transfer next Thursday, January 10th. I'm hoping to go the the appointment, have a lining around 10 and get the go ahead. Tom is going to check tonight to see if he can get the night before off. Appointments are usually pretty early and he doesnt want me going alone. The nerves have officially kicked in. I want this to work SO bad. We are counting on it working.

3) Tom took a big step forward in the hiring process for his dream department. It would mean big, HUGE, changes for us. We are literally sitting by the phone, waiting on a good news call. Apparently, that is all we ever do. We have been stressed and terrified at the results since last week..anxious is an understatement. There is talk about the hiring date being the 14th, which is ideal. When he got the call, I said that in a perfect world, we would do the FET the 10th, he can start the 14th and we find out Im pregnant on the 18th. Potentially the biggest week of our life. Its so hard to have the two biggest parts of your future out of your control.

Hurry up..and wait. Story of our life. Hurry up..make big plans, have dreams. Then wait..wait for someone else to tell you its time for them to come true. Sigh!

4) Gavin turned 10 months today. TEN! Double digits. His birthday party planning is in full swing. This has been the biggest month of his life, developmentally. He now loves the bottle and drinks 18+ oz. a day, he sleeps through the night!, he added HI to his vocabulary. He has developed a love for music and dancing as well as a bit of a temper. Most importantly, he walks! He went from standing..to taking about 4 steps to all out walking the past few weeks. Its so cute and fun to watch.

5) Trevor is doing well and oblivious to all of the stress in our lives. He spends his days playing with his new toys, going on fun outings and growing his relationship with his brother. Every single day, he asks when we are going back to Disneyworld. Now that Tom works overnight, Trevor knows he can come into our bed and keep me company. Sometimes he climbs in during the middle of the nights, other times its early in the morning. He is such a snugglebug. He slides his body into the same nook of my body he loved as an infant. If I get uncomfortable and turn over, he climbs over me, quietly, and snuggles back in the same spot. Melt my heart.

Ill try to update with pics and will hopefully share good news soon!! On both topics!!