I took Trevor in for his late 15 month appointment today. I wasn't liking his ped's office and decided to switch after they handled his last illness(ear infection & secondary pneumonia) so poorly. A friend recommended the new office, so I decided to call the insurance and switch over.
I freakin' love the new office! The waiting room is big, clean and warm. There is a sick side and a well side, divided by a huge fish tank. I just loved the feeling sitting there. We went back and the nurse was so sweet and the room was huge. Trevor was running, tickling the nurse and just having fun. He is currently 23 lbs. and 32 inches. Tall and thin! We only waited a minute or two before the doc came in. I loved her! She was young and kind. She asked me a million questions..what he eats, when he sleeps, how many words he says, etc. This is exactly what I wanted. The other office was always in and out of the room, no questions asked if I didn't have any concerns. She examined him and said he looked perfect, of course. We return at 18 months!
Of course, he had 2 shots that I was dreading. The nurse came back and I gave him a sucker. The kid didn't even flinch while having 2 needles poked in his thighs! I was soo happy that he didn't get upset. I scheduled his appointment for May and left there feeling thankful I decided to switch!
Then, my day went downhill. You see, one of our good friends had a baby yesterday. Today, my other friend had her baby boy. Also today, a friend announced she is due in September. I came home, looked at Tom and told him I feel this big right now. I was supposed to have a baby in October. Ill never get to announce the news. I just couldn't take it anymore. The tears came. We are going to visit one of the friends at the hospital tomorrow. I always said I wouldn't let infertility hold me back from my life; our life. Well, right now, it is RULING my life. I need to get a grip and stop allowing that to happen. For Tom and for this little boy:
I came home and contacted a local RESOLVE group. There's a meeting on March 17th and I hope I can find the courage to attend. I also went to the mall and found 3 dresses-one for my sisters sprinkle, one for a May wedding and one for our 5 yr anniversary. Retail therapy is necessary sometimes. Trevor walked away with 2 new pair of shoes..so it was a successful night.
Tom went in for his SA this morning. Check #1 off the to-do list. I go back for blood work on Monday morning. I have already been in contact with the drug company. They will sent my baby in a box on March 23rd. I am still bleeding, so I am not getting my hopes up for starting the cycle on March 27th. If it happens, great. If not, life will go on.